Necessity for Reconciliation - Vachanolsavam ARTICLES

Necessity for reconciliation - Vachanolsavam ARTICLEShttp://vachanolsavam.org/showcontent?cid=633 We acquire total freedom only through Jesus Christ. If the Son makes you free, you will be free indeed - Jn 8:36 Language: Home Contact The Strength Inside Magazine Donations Prayers Intercession Gallery ARTICLES Print this page Back to home Email this page to a friend Necessity for reconciliation Fr. Joseph Edattu V.C. Following the Word, “In the beginning was the Word” (Jn 1:1), Martin Boober said that “In the beginning there is the relation”. The free man often gets away from this relationship. It was through His Son that God brought back man to Him. God has sent us to this earth with a special mission: Lead all into the reconciliation which made real through the Son of God. The process of reconciliation touches upon all spheres of human activity. In reconciliation there is the re-establishment of relations that are severed, driven asunder. Relations must always be alive. In our life we learn how to love God. God wants us to value and maintain relations. The Scriptures give us ways to be reconciled. “If then there is any encouragement in Christ, any consolation from love, any sharing in the Spirit, any compassion and sympathy, make my joy complete” (Phil 2:1-2). St. Paul sees reconciliation as a sign of spiritual maturity. “May the God of steadfastness and encouragement grant you to live in harmony with one another, in accordance with Christ Jesus, so that together you may with one voice glorify the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ” (Rom 15:5). Christian community is known through mutual love. Broken relationships give others the wrong signals. “By this everyone will know you are my disciples, if you have love for one another” (Jn 13:35). That is why the incident in which the members of the Corinthian Church fought among themselves and took their case to the court pained St. Paul so much. He wrote: “I say this to your shame. Can it be that there is no one among you wise enough to decide between one believer and another, but a believer goes to court against a believer – and before unbelievers at that?” (1 Cor 6:5-6). These words of St. Paul must be food for thought for all those who quarrel and fight for property rights and such other things. In the same letter St. Paul says, “Now I appeal to you brothers and sisters, by the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that all of you be in agreement and that there be no divisions among you, but that you be united in the same mind and the same purpose” (1 Cor 1:10). Establishment of peace does not mean running away from conflicts or pleasing others by compromising your principles. Pretending that there is no problem and refusing to talk about it is really cowardice. Jesus is the prince of peace but he was never afraid in the midst of conflicts. He reacted positively. It is true that for the sake of others sometimes we have to avoid confrontation. But sometimes we have to face them. So we have to constantly pray for the assistance of the Holy Spirit. “All this is from God, who reconciled us to himself through Christ, and has given us the ministry of reconciliation” (2 Cor 5:18). Let us see how to go about the process of reconciliation. Before you enter into any dialogue with the person with whom you want to be reconciled, have a talk with God. Talk to Him about your problems. Before you talk to the person concerned, if you pray earnestly you will experience a transformation of your heart and it might also bring a change in the attitude of the person with whom you want to reconcile. When we pray for others relations will become better. Tell God your difficulties. Call on him and seek his assistance. Tell him what you think. It is unfulfilled wishes that are the causes of many confrontations. From our partners, friends and authorities we often expect things which are possible only to God. When we don’t get them we feel anger and hatred. Only God can fulfill all our wishes. St. James teaches us that the root cause behind most of our problems is the lack of prayers. “You covet something and cannot obtain it; so you engage in disputes and conflicts. You do not have, because you do not ask” (Jas 4:2). It is because we do not pray properly that we get into confrontations. Instead of turning to God for joy, we turn to the created things for pleasure. When we do not get what we want we become restless. The Lords asks, “Why don’t you turn to me first?” We should take the initiative for any reconciliation without waiting for the other person to start it. That is what God wants. Without waiting for them to come to you, you go to them. Re-establishing broken relations is an important matter. The Lord gives great significance to reconciliation. “When you are offering your gift at the altar, if you remember that your brother or sister has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar and go; first be reconciled to your brother or sister, and then come and offer your gift” (Mt 5:23-24). The right decisions taken quickly will lessen the spiritual loss. Confrontations that are not solved will impede our relations with God. Not only we get into a state of misery, but our prayers will become futile also. We should react in a positive way to the emotions of others. Give more importance to listening than talking. Before trying to overcome differences we must keenly observe the attitude of the people. “Let each of you look not to your own interests, but to the interests of others” (Phil 2:4). This is an exhortation to free ourselves from selfishness and become altruistic. When we listen to a person we value his opinions. We will then be careful about mutual relations. When we care for others, we are telling them they are precious in our eyes. The reconciliation process involves forgiveness. We should not aim at pleasing ourselves. “Each of us must please our neighbour for the good purpose of building up neighbour” (Rom 15:2). When we react patiently to the baseless show of anger in others we are making a big sacrifice. This is precisely what Jesus did for us. He forgave everyone for the sake of our salvation. A person who is keen on reconciliation admits his faults and failures first. This is the right way to understand things objectively. The Word says, “You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your neighbour’s eye” (Mt 7:5). Since there are blemishes in our lives we will have to seek the help of a third party. Pray God to reveal to you how far you are mistaken in the controversial issue. Ask yourself if you are the problem creator. Make self-examination to see whether you are a person without a sense of reality, insensitive and short-tempered with a touch-me-not attitude. “If we say we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us” (1 Jn 1:8). Pray to get a sense of remorse and repentance. Accepting one’s mistake is a powerful means of reconciliation. The wrong approach to solving problems makes the problems more complicated. When we accept our faults humbly, the anger in the other party will evaporate. Don’t accuse others without clear conviction. Be honest to accept our part in the problem. We should seek forgiveness if we have offended anyone. You should confront an issue and not an individual. For solving a problem, how we say is equally important as what we say. If we speak with anger, it will be received with anger. “Pleasant speech increases persuasiveness” (Pro 16:21). Making false accusations, speaking pejoratively, mocking etc. are lethal weapons that destroy human relations. We must destroy those weapons. Let no words of evil come out of your lips. “Let no evil talk come out of your mouths, but only what is useful for building up, as there is need, so that your words may give grace to those who hear” (Eph 4:29). We should show enough discretion and maturity in what we say. “If it is possible, so far as it depends on you, leave peaceably with all” (Rom 12:18). You will be required to pay a price for peace. Sometimes it may be the doing away with our conceit and selfishness. To keep up good relationships, we should be ready for the ‘give-and-take’ attitude. Give priority to the needs of others. “Love one another with mutual affection; outdo one another in showing honour” (Rom 12:10). “Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility regard others as better than yourselves” (Phil 2:3). Mutual love, respect and behaviour without conceit will make our relations grow. We should give greater stress to reconciliation than just solving the problem. It is true that we can’t agree with everyone in everything. When we concentrate on reconciliation, the intensity of the problem gets less and solution will become easy. Even when there are differences of opinion, relations could be maintained. There may be differences and objections. But that does not mean the relations should be broken. When we see a gem from different angles, it will give different views. God expects unity and not uniformity. Even when people differ on certain issues, they must be able to walk hand in hand. Let us resuscitate relations that are moribund. Be prophets of peace. Let us become spokespersons of reconciliation and that way let us understand, recognize and 1 of 2 07/15/2011 2:24 PM Website maintained by Vachanolsavam.CyberPyramid : magazineWWWDEVplug 2 of 2 07/15/2011 2:24 PM .Vachanolsavam ARTICLES http://vachanolsavam. All rights reserved.org : eServices . Display optimised to 800 x 600 pixels. Magazine: March 2011 © Popular Mission Magazine 2003-2004.org/showcontent?cid=633 acknowledge others. Be in a position to give solace to those who experience spiritual turbulence and turmoil. Let us live in the deep experience of the presence of the Almighty. vachanolsavam.Necessity for reconciliation .