Annamalai Swami.doc

Annamalai Swami1906-1995 Annamalai Swami was born in 1906 in a small village in Tamil Nadu, southern India. He was named Sella Perumal, and from an early age showed a keen interest in spirituality. In 1928, when he was 22 years old, he traveled to Tiruvannamalai to meet Bhagavan Sri Ramana Maharshi who lived near the city along the base of the slope of the holy mountain Arunachala. Following in the footsteps of Sri Seshadri Swamigal, who saved the young Ramana from the ravages of insects and vermin in the underground vault he first inhabited, and Palaniswami, who stayed with Ramana in Virupaksha Cave and Skandasraman Cave, he became the Maharshi’s personal attendant and given the name Annamalai Swami (Annamalai is another name for Arunachala). Swami Annamalai’s duties, after being directed to do so by Sri Ramana, was to oversee all phases of the ongoing construction, continuing expansion, and positive growth of the Ramana Ashram, including the goshala (cow shed), dining hall, dispensary and other projects. HOW THE ASHRAM LOOKED WHEN ANNAMALAI ARRIVED IN 1928 "Just remain like the sky and let thoughtclouds come and go." QUESTION : What is the easiest way to be free of the 'little self'? The Self is always attained, it is always realised; it is not something that you have to seek, reach or discover. Your vasanas [mental habits and tendencies] and all the wrong ideas you have about yourself are blocking and hiding the experience of the real Self. If you don't identify with the wrong ideas, your Selfnature will not be hidden from you. You said that you needed help. If you desire to gain a proper understanding of your real nature is intense enough, help will automatically come. If you want to generate an awareness of your real nature you will be immeasurably helped by having contact with a jnani [realised being]. The power and grace which a jnani radiates quieten the mind and automatically eliminate the wrong ideas you have about yourself. You can make progress by having satsang [association] of a realised Guru and by constant spiritual practice. The Guru cannot do everything for you. If you want to give up the limiting habits of many lifetimes, you must practise constantly. Most people take the appearance of the snake in the rope to be reality. Acting on their misperceptions they think up many different ways of killing the snake. They can never succeed in getting rid of the snake until they give up the idea that there is a snake there at all. People who want to kill or control the mind have the same problem: they imagine that there is a mind which needs to be controlled and take drastic steps to beat it into submission. If, instead, they generated the understanding that there is no such thing as the mind, all there problems would come to an end. You must generate the conviction, "I am the all-pervasive consciousness in which all bodies and minds in the world are appearing and disappearing. I am that consciousness which remains unchanged and unaffected by these appearances and disappearances". Stabilise yourself in that conviction. That is all you need to do. Bhagavan [Ramana Maharshi] once told a story about a man who wanted to bury his own shadow in a deep pit. He dug the pit and stood in such a position that his shadow was on the bottom of it. The man then tried to bury it by covering it with earth. Each time he threw some soil in the hole the shadow appeared on top of it. Of course, he never succeeded in burying the shadow. Many people behave like this when they meditate. They take the mind to be real, try to fight it and kill it, and always fail. These fights against the mind are all mental activities which strengthen the mind instead of weakening it. If you want to get rid of the mind, all you have to do is understand that it is 'not me'. Cultivate the awareness "I am the immanent consciousness". When that understanding becomes firm, the non-existent mind will not trouble you. Question: I don't think that repeating "I am not the mind, I am consciousness" will ever convince me that I am not the mind. It will just be another thought going on within the mind. If I could experience, even for a moment, what it is like to be without the mind, the conviction would automatically come. I think that one second of experiencing consciousness as it really is would be more convincing that several years of mental repetitions. Annamalai Swami: Every time you go to sleep you have the experience of being without a mind. You cannot deny that you exist while you are asleep and you cannot deny that your mind is not functioning while you are in dreamless sleep. This daily experience should convince you that it is possible to continue your existence without a mind. Of course, you do not have the full experience of consciousness while you are asleep, but if you think about what happens during this state you should come to understand that your existence, the continuity of your being, is in no way dependent on your mind or your identification with it. When the mind reappears every morning you instantly jump to the conclusion "This is the real me". If you reflect on this proposition for some time you will see how absurd it is. If what you really are only exists when the mind is present, you have to accept that you didn't exist while you were asleep. No one will accept such an absurd conclusion. If you analyse your alternating states you will discover that it is your direct experience that you exist whether you are awake or asleep. You will also discover that the mind only becomes active while you are waking or dreaming. From these simple daily experiences it should be easy to understand that the mind is something that comes and goes. Your existence is not wiped out each time the mind ceases to function. I am not telling you some philosophical theory; I am telling you something that you can validate by direct experience in any twenty-four hour period of your life. Take these facts, which you can discover by directly experiencing them, and investigate them a little more. When the mind appears every morning don't jump to the usual conclusion, "This is me; these thoughts are mine." Instead, watch these thoughts come and go without identifying with them in any way. If you can resist the impulse to claim each and every thought as your own, you will come to a startling conclusion: you will discover that you are the consciousness in which the thoughts appear and disappear. You are allowed to run free. Like the snake which appears in the rope, you will discover that the mind is only an illusion which appears through ignorance or misperception. You want some experience which will convince you that what I am saying is true. You can have that experience if you give up your life-long habit of inventing an 'I' which claims all thoughts as 'mine'. Be conscious of yourself as consciousness alone, watch all the thoughts come and go. Come to the conclusion, by direct experience, that you are really consciousness itself, not its ephemeral contents. Clouds come and go in the sky but the appearance and disappearance of the clouds doesn't affect the sky. Your real nature is like the sky, like space. Just remain like the sky and let thought-clouds come and go. If you cultivate this attitude of indifference towards the mind, gradually you will cease to identify yourself with it. Question: When I began to do sadhana [spiritual practice] everything went smoothly at first. There was a lot of peace and happiness and jnana [true knowledge] seemed very near. But nowadays there is hardly any peace, just mental obstacles and hindrances. Annamalai Swami: Whenever obstacles come on the path, think of them as not me'. Cultivate the attitude that the real you is beyond the reach of all troubles and obstacles. There are no obstacles for the Self. If you can remember that you always are the Self, obstacles will be of no importance. One of the alvars [a group of Vaishnavite saints] once remarked that if one is not doing any spiritual practice one is not aware of any mind problems. He said that it is only when one starts to do meditation that one becomes aware of the different ways that the mind causes us trouble. This is very true. But one should not worry about any of the obstacles or fear them. One should merely regard them as being not me. They can only cause you trouble while you think that they are your problems. The obstructing vasanas may look like a large mountain which obstructs your progress. Don't be intimidated by the size. It is not a mountain of rock, it is a mountain of camphor. If you light one corner of it with the flame of discriminative attention, it will all burn to nothing. Stand back from the mountain of problems, refuse to acknowledge that they are yours, and they will dissolve and disappear before your eyes. Don’t be deluded by your thoughts and vasanas. They are always trying to trick you into believing that you are a real person, that the world is real, and that all your problems are real. Don't fight them; just ignore them. Don't accept delivery of all the wrong ideas that keep coming to you. Establish yourself in the conviction that you are the Self and that nothing can stick to you or affect you. Once you have that conviction you will find that you automatically ignore the habits of the mind. When the rejection of mental activities becomes continuous and automatic, you will begin to have the experience of the Self. If you see two strangers quarrelling in the distance you do not give much attention to them because you know that the dispute is none of your business. Treat the contents of your mind in the same way. Instead of filling your mind with thoughts and then organising fights between them, pay no attention to the mind at all. Rest quietly in the feeling of "I am", which is consciousness, and cultivate the attitude that all thoughts, all perceptions are 'not me'. When you have learned to regard your mind as a distant stranger, you will not pay any attention to all the obstacles it keeps inventing for you. Mental problems feed on the attention that you give them. The more you worry about them, the stronger they become. If you ignore them, they lose their power and finally vanish. Question: I am always thinking and believing that there is only the Self but somehow there is still a feeling that I want or need something more. Annamalai Swami: Who is it that wants? If you can find the answer to that question there will be no one to want anything. Question: Children are born without egos. As they begin to grow up, how do their egos arise and cover the Self? Annamalai Swami: As young children may appear to have no egos but its ego and all the latent vasanas that go with it are there in seed form. As the child's body grows bigger, the ego also grows bigger. The ego is produced by the power of maya [illusion], which is one of the shaktis [powers] of the Self. The two cannot be separate. when the identity with the body and the mind has been dropped. of being. It is a name for the dynamic aspect of the Self. What exactly do you mean by shakti? Annamalai Swami: Shakti is energy or power. a Frenchman or an Indian. The fifth shakti. When maya is totally inactive. you can say that shanti is the unmanifest aspect of the Self while shakti is the manifest. It is the power of maya which makes us believe in the reality of things which have no reality outside our imagination. The Self alone is real. which is maya. the one place where you can be free of it. Shanti and shakti are like the sea and its waves. there is an awareness of consciousness.Question: How does maya operate? How does it originate? Since nothing exists except the Self. Shanti is motionless. "Everything that is not the formless Self". If you are in a boat which is leaking. If you try to investigate the origin of maya with your mind you are doomed to fail because any answer you come up with will be a maya answer. is indivisible. which operate simultaneously. If you ask. It is not helpful to enquire why there is maya and how it operates. Put all your energy into escaping from its effect. The five shaktis are creation. destruction. Question: You say that maya is one of the shaktis. These three things are just ideas which are brought into an apparent existence when maya is present and active. Shanti. everything else is a figment of our imagination. If you want to separate them at all. vast and all-encompassing. . with varying functions. that is. counteracts and removes the fourth shakti. If you want to understand how maya operates and originates you should establish yourself in the Self. and then watch how it takes you over each time you fail to keep your attention there. You just plug the leak. no mind and no world. Shakti and shanti [peace] are two aspects of the same consciousness. Don't worry about where maya comes from. When one is established in that state there is no body. When maya is active. "What are these imaginary things?" the answer is. is the vast unmoving body of water. A flame has two properties: light and heat. preservation. The waves that appear and move on the surface are shakti. how does the Self manage to conceal its own nature from itself? Annamalai Swami: The Self. which is infinite power and the source of all power. But really they are not separate. you don’t waste time asking whether the hole was made by an Italian. the unmanifest aspect. veiling [maya shakti] and grace. Yet within this indivisible Self there are five shaktis or powers. the sole effective way to dissolve it is the path shown by Bhagavan: one must do self-enquiry and discriminate between what is real and what is unreal. whereas waves are active. grace. they would realise that all forms are just appearances which manifest within the one indivisible consciousness. they have only seen the letters and pictures that are on it. Then they say. There can be no words or pictures without the paper. such as the laws that keep the planets in their orbits. The universe is controlled by the one shakti. are all manifestations of this shakti. This is one of the paradoxes of the Self. This is not so. is always aware that shakti is not separate from him. Question: You talk a lot about vasanas. In that state of realisation he sees that all activities are caused by shakti. If this is so. You have the idea that the Self is something that you see or experience. That consciousness is the Self that you are looking for. Question: You say that everything is the Self. In that awareness everything is his Self and all actions are his. Bhagavan sometimes remarked humorously: "People just open a newspaper and glance through it. Instead there is an awareness that all activities are the shakti of the one Self. This moves and orders all things. Even if you don't see the Self. but people always forget the paper while they are reading the words. Could you please tell me exactly what they are and how they function? Annamalai Swami: Vasanas are habits of the mind. "I have seen the paper". the Self is still there. Alternatively. The Self is the awareness or the consciousness in which the seeing and the experiencing take place. They are the mistaken . the ignore the screen itself. it is equally correct to say that he never does anything. sometimes called Parameswara shakti [the power of the Supreme Lord]. The jnani.Bhagavan used to say that after realisation the jivanmukta [liberated one] experiences shanti within and is established permanently in that shanti. With this kind of partial vision it is easy to come to the conclusion that all forms are unconnected with each other and separate from the person who sees them. why can't I see the Self clearly? Why is it hidden from me? Annamalai Swami: Because you are looking in the wrong direction." Bhagavan would then use this analogy to show that while people see the names and forms that appear on the screen of consciousness. You can be that consciousness but you can never see it because it is not something that is separate from you. If people were to be aware of the consciousness instead of the forms that appear in it. But really they haven't seen the paper. who is fully established in the shanti. even maya. After realisation one is aware that there is no individual people doing anything. Natural laws. Ignore all the vasanas that rise in the mind and instead fix your attention in the Self. If mental activity is necessary while one is in sattva guna it takes place. Even if they are standing on bare rock they still try to scratch the ground. Rajoguna [a state of excessive mental activity]. It does not mean that you should be physically still. In that state you will feel very sleepy and mentally dull. In the absence of a mind he knows himself only as consciousness. it means that you should always abide in the Self. Just be still. tamoguna [a state of mental torpor] arises and predominates. Be who you are. speaks of bhoga vasanas [vasanas which are for enjoyment] and bandha vasanas [vasanas which produce bondage].identifications and the repeated thought patterns that occur again and again. and pull you outwards towards the world rather than inwards towards the Self. Question: Bhagavan often told devotees to "Be still". This happens so often and so continuously that the mind never gets a chance to rest or to understand its real nature. It is the vasanas which cover up the experience of the Self. catch your attention. When they rise habitually as vasanas they brainwash us into thinking that they are true. produces emotions and a mind which is restless. Most of our ideas and thoughts are incorrect. he is no longer able to identify himself with the body. But even though he knows that he is not the body. Did he mean "Be mentally still"? Annamalai Swami: Bhagavan's famous instruction "summa iru" [be still] is often misunderstood. bliss. Vasanas arise. Even our desire to transcend our vasanas is a vasana. In sattva guna [a state of mental quietness and clarity] there is stillness and harmony. the Self cannot be felt. Would Swamiji please clarify the difference. When tamoguna and rajoguna predominate. The fundamental vasanas such as "I am the body" or "I am the mind" have appeared in us so many times that we automatically accept that they are true. You can only escape the habits of the mind by abiding in consciousness as consciousness. on the other hand. It is a perpetual habit with them. Annamalai Swami: Nothing can cause bondage for the jnani because his mind is dead. He says that for the jnani there are bhoga vasanas but no bandha vasanas. That is the stillness that Bhagavan was prescribing. it is a fact that the body is . If there is too much physical stillness. They are habits and patterns of thought that appear again and again even if they are not wanted. clarity and an absence of wandering thoughts. Vasanas function in much the same the way. But for the rest of the time there is stillness. in Talks with Ramana Maharshi. Question: Bhagavan. Cocks like to claw the ground. If sattva guna predominates one experiences peace. Because the mind is dead. When we think "I must meditate" or "I must make an effort" we are just organising a fight between two different vasanas. That is why it is sometimes said that for the jnani there are bhoga vasanas but no bandha vasanas. Because of this he never falls back into samsara [worldly illusion] again. he can witness all its activities without getting involved in them in any way. you are identifying with the mind and making new karma for yourself. he is not creating any new karma for himself. it means you have to take another birth to enjoy it. Question: So whatever happens to us in life only happens because of our past likes and dislikes? Annamalai Swami: Yes. That is why they differ from jnani to jnani. That is . The jnani's body carries out all the acts which are destined for it. and the jnani will continue to be aware of it. Some jnanis may accumulate wealth. When new karma has been created like this. but they do have the power to make the body behave in certain ways. When vasanas rise in ordinary people who still identify with the body and the mind. and because he has no likes or dislikes. While you are still making judgements about what is good and what is bad.still alive. he will also be aware of the thoughts and vasanas that arise in that body. Because he knows that he is not the body. It is the bhoga vasanas which determine the kind of lifestyle a jnani will lead. But because the jnani makes no judgement about what is good or bad. Some vasanas are embraced wholeheartedly while others are rejected as being undesirable. The jnani is aware of the consequences of all these vasanas without ever identifying with them. There will be no rebirth for the jnani because once the mind has been destroyed there is no possibility of any new karma being created. The vasanas arise because of the habits and practices of previous lifetimes. Question: How can one learn not to react when vasanas arise in the mind? Is there anything special that we should be looking out for? Annamalai Swami: You must learn to recognise them when they arise. some may study the shastra [Scriptures] while others may remain illiterate. some may sit in silence. The bhoga vasanas differ from jnani to jnani. These likes and dislikes generate desires and fears which in turn produce more karma. but others may become celibate monks. None of these vasanas has the power to cause bondage for him because he never identifies with them. Because the jnani is still aware of the body. some may get married ands raise families. The body of the jnani enjoys and experiences these vasanas although the jnani himself is not affected by them. until its own karma [destined action] is exhausted. That body will continue to live. they cause likes and dislikes. When Bhagavan spoke like this he sometimes used the analogy of a besiged fort. challenge each emerging thought as it appears by asking. . ……………………………………………………………………………………. judgements. If you can stop the mind from reacting to sense impressions you can eliminate a large number of your vasanas. If you want to pay attention to a special area of danger. When you have sealed off the mind in this way. with full attention. ‘Where have you come from?’ or ‘Who is the person who is having this thought?’ If you can do this continuously. The mind catches hold of sense impressions and processes them in such a way that they produce long chains of uncontrolled thoughts. “To whom is this thought coming?” as soon as the thought appears. If you can catch them early enough and frequently enough they will not cause you trouble. If one systematically loses off all the entrances to such a fort and then picks off the occupants one by one as they try to come out. Bhagavan said that we should apply these same tactics to the mind. Learn to watch how your senses behave.the only way. Don’t let new ideas. if we hate or love someone or something. If we have likes or dislikes. sooner or later the fort willl be be empty.’ This is how self-enquiry should be practiced. and don’t let rising thoughts flourish and escape your attention. Annamalai Swami – Bhagavan [Ramana Maharshi] has said: ‘When thoughts arise stop them from developing by enquiring. enter the mind.. some bondage will arise in the mind. likes. watch how the five senses operate. Jnanis never like or dislike anything. new thoughts will appear momentarily and then disappear. Learn to watch how the mind reacts to sense impressions. etc. It is the nature of the mind to seek stimulation through the five senses. What does it matter if many thoughts keep coming up? Enquire into their origin or find out who has the thoughts and sooner or later the flow of thoughts will stop. That is why they are free of all bondage. How to go about doing this? Seal off the entrances and exits to the mind by not reacting to rising thoughts or sense impressions. Bhagavan never like or disliked anything. dislikes. In the fort of the mind the occupants. the occupants must surrender or die. the thoughts will all die of starvation. if you relax your vigilance even for a few seconds and allow new thoughts to escape and develop unchallenged. the siege will be lifted and the mind will regain some or all of its former strength. This will happen automatically as soon as you cease to be interested in any of your rising thoughts. When you have eradicated all thoughts except for the thinker himself by ceaseless enquiry or by refusing to give them any attention. While there are still stray thoughts which attract or evade your attentoin. . the ‘I’-thought will always be directing its attention outwards rather than inwards. which identifies with all other thoughts and says. However. When the supplies run out. not as mind or body. The purpose of self-enquiry is to make the ‘I’-thought move inwards. In that thought-free state you wlil begin to experience yourself as consciousness. This surrender will only take place when the ‘I’-thought has ceased to identify with rising thoughts. In a real fort the occupants need a continuous supply of food and water to hold out during a siege. If the thinker witholds his attention from rising thoughts or challenges them before they have a chance to develop. leaving behind it only an awareness of consciousness. a time will come when no more thoughts arise. or if they do. need a thinker to pay attention to them and indulge in them. they will only be fleeting. undistracting images on the periphery of consciousness. towards the Self.If you can maintain the siege for long enough. Mind is only a collection of thoughts and the thinker who thinks them. which are thoughts. the ‘I’-thought sinks into the Heart and surrenders. The thinker is the ‘I’-thought. ‘I am this body’. You challenge them by repeatedly asking yourself ‘Who am I? Who is the person who is having these thoughts?’ If the challenge is to be effective you must make it before the rising thought has had a chance to develop into a stream of thoughts. the primal thought which rises from the Self before all others. Remember that nothing that happens in the mind is ‘you’. the false ‘I’ wll vanish leaving only the unbroken awareness of the real. This book is written by David Godman and it contains wonderful account of Annamalai Swami Life with Ramana Maharshi. fight back by affirming. ‘I may be dead in seven days’. Be aware of it so strongly and so intensely that no other thoughts have the energy to arise and distract you.’. But if these things start happening to you. ‘I am the Self. it will evade your attentiveness. Don’t take delivery of wrong beliefs and don’t identify with the incoming thoughts that will give you pain and suffering.. It is enough that you remember that the thoughts are not you. Self-inquiry must be done continuously. Go deeply into this feeling of ‘I’. Sadhana is a battlefield. Continuous attentiveness will only come with long practice. You have to be vigilant. If you hold this feeling of ‘I’ long enough and strongly enough. If you are truly watchful. pages 272–73. immanent ‘I’. I am the Self. If you have the slightest interest in any particular thought. Do it and see what happens. I am the Self. These . Annamalai Swami answers to meditation Questions of Seekers If you are having trouble with your enthusiasm for sadhana. connect with other thoughts. It doesn’t work if you regard it as a part-time activity.Source: from book “Living by the Words of Bhagavan”. This will happen more easily if you are accustomed to reacting emotionally to a particular thought. and none of it is your business. and take over your mind for a few seconds. But to reach this level of disassociation you must have no attachments at all. Let go of all the things that you pretend are important in your daily life and instead focus on the Self for twenty-four hours a day. Stories of How Ramana Ashram was constructed. You don’t have to worry about the thoughts that rise up inside you. just tell yourself. consciousness itself. each thought will dissolve at the moment that it appears. When the rejection of mental activities becomes continuous and automatic. This is the string on which all other thoughts are threaded. By questioning ‘Who am I?’ and by constantly meditating. But you should not get sidetracked from you main objective which is establishing yourself as consciousness. A strong determination to pursue enquiry in this way will dissolve all doubts. Thought after thought after thought. affect you or make you suffer. Meditation must be continuous. It also follows that if we cease to identify with the body. When you know that the snake of the mind never existed. the ‘I am the body’ thoughts that come your way will no longer have the power to touch you. There are so many thoughts in the mind. one comes to the clarity of being. maya follows. If you can hold on to this knowledge ‘I am Self’ at all times. There is nothing wrong with looking at Bhagavan’s picture. With practice. maya will not affect us anymore. though it is mostly sub-conscious: ‘I am the body’. meditation and work can go on simultaneously. obscuring awareness of it. when you know that the rope of reality is all that exists.affirmations will lessen the power of the ‘I am the body’ arrows and eventually they will armour-plate you so successfully. It is a very good practice. As often as you become aware of them. But there is one thought that is continuous. ‘To whom do they come?’ This continuous enquiry will establish you in your own Self and you will have no further problems.As long as vasanas continue to exist they will rise and cover the reality. Once we identify ourselves with the body by thinking this thought. Don’t get attached to states of bliss or give them priority over the quest for the Self. The current of meditation must be present in all your activities. question. no further practice is necessary. doubts and fears will not trouble you again. . you will begin to have the experience of the Self. One must keep one’s attention on the Self if one wants to make progress on the spiritual path The thoughts that come and go are not you. This meditation has . that will be enough. Don’t allocate periods of time for this. If you don’t forget that. not think about it. Be that consciousness. mind is just a Self-inflicted area of darkness in which the light of the Self has been deliberately shut out. bliss. When I say. Your reality is peace. Bhagavan is always present. that will be enough. The Self is pure energy. Hold onto that. Any energy or peace you experience can only come from the Self. In the same way. Bhagavan’s famous instruction ‘summa iru’ [be still] is often misunderstood. It does not mean that you should be physically still. but to make this discovery continuous meditation is required. Just be aware of the Self and try to pay as little attention as possible to the body. pure power. ‘Meditate on the Self’ I am asking you to be the Self. Whatever comes and goes is not you. inside you and in front of you. and you know yourself to be that Brahman. Be aware of what remains when thoughts stop. But for the rest of the time there is stillness… If sattva guna predominates one experiences pleace. The ego is the ‘I am the body’ idea. it means that you should always abide in the Self… In sattva guna [a state of mental quietness and clarity] there is stillness and harmony. clarity and an absence of wandering thoughts. Brahman alone remains. Drop the identification with the body. Don’t regard it as something you do when you sit with your eyes closed. The mind and the body are both inert. If you can give up duality. Be aware of the consciousness that is the origin of all your thoughts. These experiences are making you too body-conscious. If mental activity is necessary while one is in sattva guna it takes place. That is the stillness that Bhagavan was prescribing. Remove this idea and you shine as the Self. If you don’t cover the vision of Bhagavan with your ego. Having heard this. Annamalai Swami – Bhagavan [Ramana Maharshi] has said: ‘When thoughts arise stop them from developing by enquiring. wrote in one of his poems: ‘My Guru merely told me that I am consciousness. You have to keep up the enquiry. Your ultimate need is to get established in the changeless peace of the Self. What does it matter if many thoughts keep coming up? Enquire into their origin or find out who has the thoughts and sooner or later the flow of thoughts will stop. I held onto consciousness.’ This is how selfenquiry should be practiced. a Tamil saint whom Bhagavan often quoted. What he told me was just one sentence. It is enough that you remember that the thoughts are not you. By doing this you will penetrate deeper and deeper and become detached from the mind. If you are having trouble remind yourself. “To whom is this thought coming?” as soon as the thought appears.’ Then go back into enquiry ‘Who am I?’. You don’t have to worry about the thoughts that rise up inside you.’ In every moment you only have one real choice: to be aware of the Self or to identify with the body and the mind. but I cannot describe the bliss I attained from holding onto that one simple sentence. It has to be continued all the time. and none of it is your business. Through that one sentence I attained a peace and a happiness that can never be explained in words. For this you have to give up all thoughts. I am not this mind or the wandering thoughts. . ‘This is just happening on the surface of my mind.to be continuous. walking and even talking. ‘To whom is this happening?’ all the time. Do it while eating. This will only come about after you have made an intense effort. Remember that nothing that happens in the mind is ‘you’. Tayumanuvar. a time will come when no more thoughts arise. which are thoughts. the occupants must surrender or die. not as mind or body. In a real fort the occupants need a continuous supply of food and water to hold out during a siege. sooner or later the fort willl be be empty. need a thinker to pay attention to them and indulge in them. In that thought-free state you wlil begin to experience yourself as consciousness. challenge each emerging thought as it appears by asking. When the supplies run out. likes. Bhagavan said that we should apply these same tactics to the mind. if you relax your vigilance even for a few seconds and allow new thoughts to escape and develop unchallenged. enter the mind. judgements. the siege will be lifted and the mind will regain some or all of its former strength. Don’t let new ideas. with full attention.When Bhagavan spoke like this he sometimes used the analogy of a besiged fort. and don’t let rising thoughts flourish and escape your attention. new thoughts will appear momentarily and then disappear. If one systematically loses off all the entrances to such a fort and then picks off the occupants one by one as they try to come out. ‘Where have you come from?’ or ‘Who is the person who is having this thought?’ If you can do this continuously. or if they do. . they will only be fleeting. dislikes. If you can maintain the siege for long enough. undistracting images on the periphery of consciousness. etc. How to go about doing this? Seal off the entrances and exits to the mind by not reacting to rising thoughts or sense impressions. In the fort of the mind the occupants. When you have sealed off the mind in this way. However. pages 272–73. The purpose of self-enquiry is to make the ‘I’-thought move inwards. the primal thought which rises from the Self before all others. Let go of all the . ‘I may be dead in seven days’. While there are still stray thoughts which attract or evade your attentoin. This will happen automatically as soon as you cease to be interested in any of your rising thoughts. the thoughts will all die of starvation. The thinker is the ‘I’-thought. This surrender will only take place when the ‘I’-thought has ceased to identify with rising thoughts. the ‘I’-thought sinks into the Heart and surrenders. ‘I am this body’. Annamalai Swami answers to meditation Questions of Seekers If you are having trouble with your enthusiasm for sadhana. leaving behind it only an awareness of consciousness. towards the Self. You challenge them by repeatedly asking yourself ‘Who am I? Who is the person who is having these thoughts?’ If the challenge is to be effective you must make it before the rising thought has had a chance to develop into a stream of thoughts. Source: from book “Living by the Words of Bhagavan”. This book is written by David Godman and it contains wonderful account of Annamalai Swami Life with Ramana Maharshi. Mind is only a collection of thoughts and the thinker who thinks them.If the thinker witholds his attention from rising thoughts or challenges them before they have a chance to develop. When you have eradicated all thoughts except for the thinker himself by ceaseless enquiry or by refusing to give them any attention. the ‘I’-thought will always be directing its attention outwards rather than inwards. which identifies with all other thoughts and says. Stories of How Ramana Ashram was constructed. just tell yourself. It doesn’t work if you regard it as a part-time activity. it will evade your attentiveness. It is enough that you remember that the thoughts are not you. fight back by affirming. You don’t have to worry about the thoughts that rise up inside you. These affirmations will lessen the power of the ‘I am the body’ arrows and eventually they will armour-plate you so successfully. This will happen more easily if you are accustomed to reacting emotionally to a particular thought. the false ‘I’ wll vanish leaving only the unbroken awareness of the real. Go deeply into this feeling of ‘I’. and none of it is your business.things that you pretend are important in your daily life and instead focus on the Self for twenty-four hours a day. Remember that nothing that happens in the mind is ‘you’. the ‘I am the body’ thoughts . each thought will dissolve at the moment that it appears. ‘I am the Self. Sadhana is a battlefield. If you are truly watchful. If you have the slightest interest in any particular thought. But if these things start happening to you. immanent ‘I’.. and take over your mind for a few seconds. If you hold this feeling of ‘I’ long enough and strongly enough. consciousness itself. connect with other thoughts. You have to be vigilant. Be aware of it so strongly and so intensely that no other thoughts have the energy to arise and distract you. But to reach this level of disassociation you must have no attachments at all. Self-inquiry must be done continuously. I am the Self. Continuous attentiveness will only come with long practice.’. Do it and see what happens. Don’t take delivery of wrong beliefs and don’t identify with the incoming thoughts that will give you pain and suffering. I am the Self. ‘To whom do they come?’ This continuous enquiry will establish you in your own Self and you will have no further problems. There are so many thoughts in the mind.that come your way will no longer have the power to touch you. When the rejection of mental activities becomes continuous and automatic. obscuring awareness of it. If you can hold on to this knowledge ‘I am Self’ at all times. though it is mostly sub-conscious: ‘I am the body’. Meditation must be continuous. maya follows. But you should not get sidetracked from you main objective which is establishing yourself as consciousness. when you know that the rope of reality is all that exists. It is a very good practice. When you know that the snake of the mind never existed. Once we identify ourselves with the body by thinking this thought.As long as vasanas continue to exist they will rise and cover the reality. question. maya will not affect us anymore. A strong determination to pursue enquiry in this way will dissolve all doubts. This is the string on which all other thoughts are threaded. As often as you become aware of them. By questioning ‘Who am I?’ and by constantly meditating. you will begin to have the experience of the Self. But there is one thought that is continuous. With practice. Don’t get attached to states of bliss or give them priority over the quest for the Self. meditation and work can go on simultaneously. affect you or make you suffer. It also follows that if we cease to identify with the body. . doubts and fears will not trouble you again. no further practice is necessary. Thought after thought after thought. The current of meditation must be present in all your activities. one comes to the clarity of being. There is nothing wrong with looking at Bhagavan’s picture. That is the stillness that Bhagavan was prescribing. it means that you should always abide in the Self… In sattva guna [a state of mental quietness and clarity] there is stillness and harmony. The Self is pure energy. bliss. Just be aware of the Self and try to pay as little attention as possible to the body. Hold onto that. Bhagavan is always present. It does not mean that you should be physically still. inside you and in front of you. When I say. Be aware of what remains when thoughts stop. . Whatever comes and goes is not you. If you don’t cover the vision of Bhagavan with your ego. Be aware of the consciousness that is the origin of all your thoughts. not think about it. Remove this idea and you shine as the Self. Your reality is peace. that will be enough. The ego is the ‘I am the body’ idea. But for the rest of the time there is stillness… If sattva guna predominates one experiences pleace. that will be enough.One must keep one’s attention on the Self if one wants to make progress on the spiritual path The thoughts that come and go are not you. Drop the identification with the body. If you don’t forget that. These experiences are making you too bodyconscious. Any energy or peace you experience can only come from the Self. mind is just a Self-inflicted area of darkness in which the light of the Self has been deliberately shut out. Be that consciousness. ‘Meditate on the Self’ I am asking you to be the Self. The mind and the body are both inert. Bhagavan’s famous instruction ‘summa iru’ [be still] is often misunderstood. If mental activity is necessary while one is in sattva guna it takes place. In the same way. clarity and an absence of wandering thoughts. pure power. I am not this mind or the wandering thoughts. walking and even talking. and you know yourself to be that Brahman. You don’t have to worry about the thoughts that rise up inside you. ‘This is just happening on the surface of my mind. This meditation has to be continuous. Don’t regard it as something you do when you sit with your eyes closed. This will only come about after you have made an intense effort. What he told me was just one sentence. Do it while eating. ‘To whom is this happening?’ all the time. Don’t allocate periods of time for this. Having heard this. You have to keep up the enquiry. It has to be continued all the time. a Tamil saint whom Bhagavan often quoted. and none of it is your business. I held onto consciousness.If you can give up duality. Tayumanuvar. Brahman alone remains. Through that one sentence I attained a peace and a happiness that can never be explained in words. . but to make this discovery continuous meditation is required.’ In every moment you only have one real choice: to be aware of the Self or to identify with the body and the mind. If you are having trouble remind yourself. but I cannot describe the bliss I attained from holding onto that one simple sentence. wrote in one of his poems: ‘My Guru merely told me that I am consciousness.’ Then go back into enquiry ‘Who am I?’. By doing this you will penetrate deeper and deeper and become detached from the mind. It is enough that you remember that the thoughts are not you. Remember that nothing that happens in the mind is ‘you’. But for the rest of the time there is stillness… If sattva guna predominates one experiences peace. clarity and an absence of wandering thoughts. It does not mean that you should be physically still. Living by the Words of Bhagavan. — quoted in David Godman. you will begin to have the experience of the Self.Your ultimate need is to get established in the changeless peace of the Self. Living by the Words of Bhagavan. — quoted in David Godman. page 263 Bhagavan's famous instruction 'summa iru' [be still] is often misunderstood. If mental activity is necessary while one is in sattva guna it takes place. That is the stillness that Bhagavan was prescribing. For this you have to give up all thoughts. it means that you should always abide in the Self… In sattva guna [a state of mental quietness and clarity] there is stillness and harmony. bliss. Quotes from Annamalai Swami When the rejection of mental activities becomes continuous and automatic. The current of meditation must be present . page 267 Meditation must be continuous. Be aware of it so strongly and so intensely that no other thoughts have the energy to arise and distract you. — Annamalai Swami: Final Talks. meditation and work can go on simultaneously. consciousness itself. and take over your mind for a few seconds. This will happen more easily if you are accustomed to reacting emotionally to a particular thought. — Annamalai Swami: Final Talks. — quoted in David Godman. — quoted in David Godman. connect with other thoughts. mind is just a Self-inflicted area of darkness in which the light of the Self has been deliberately shut out. Living by the Words of Bhagavan. Be aware of what remains when thoughts stop. Be that consciousness. Living by the Words of Bhagavan . Living by the Words of Bhagavan. page 282 Go deeply into this feeling of 'I'. That is its nature. page 299 The Self is always alert. — quoted in David Godman. But to reach this level of disassociation you must have no attachments at all. Living by the Words of Bhagavan. page 39 In the same way. — quoted in David Godman. each thought will dissolve at the moment that it appears. Living by the Words of Bhagavan. If you hold this feeling of 'I' long enough and strongly enough. Be aware of the consciousness that is the origin of all your thoughts. immanent 'I'. If you have the slightest interest in any particular thought. page 30 If you can hold on to this knowledge 'I am Self' at all times. — Annamalai Swami: Final Talks. it will evade your attentiveness. — quoted in David Godman. 'Meditate on the Self' I am asking you to be the Self. the false 'I' wll vanish leaving only the unbroken awareness of the real. pages 342–43 Self-inquiry must be done continuously. page 327 Continuous attentiveness will only come with long practice. page 274 When I say.. If you are truly watchful. With practice. no further practice is necessary. page 57 .in all your activities. not think about it. It doesn't work if you regard it as a part-time activity. page 63 Tayumanuvar. What he told me was just one sentence. — Annamalai Swami: Final Talks. — Annamalai Swami: Final Talks. we must learn to contact this consciousness by being aware of this all the time. And you should not think tht you will make more progress as a bhakta simply because you find it easy to generate joyful states of mind. a Tamil saint whom Bhagavan often quoted. but I cannot describe the bliss I attained from holding onto that one simple sentence. but abiding in the guru's teachings is far better. The same consciousness which is within you and within bhagavan's form is within all forms. you should not jump to the conclusion that you are not making any progress with your self inquiry simply because you find it hard to do. A: It is always good to worship the guru. One rarely finds blissful or peaceful doing it. wrote in one of his poems: 'My Guru merely told me that I am consciousness. A: There is nothign wrong with looking at Bhagavan's picture. more joyfull and more effortless. For this you have to give up all thoughts. When I enquire "Who am I" I feel that I must make a great effort to make the mind subside. Q: I know that Bhagavan is in all forms but some times I find it easier to feel his grace by concentrating on an image of him. sometimes i feel like treating myself to a little bliss by looking at bhagavan's picture for a while.' ………………… Page 333 : living by the words of Bhagavan Quote Q: I feel that the bhakti path is an effortless way. But you should not get sidetracked from our main objective which is establishing yourself as . Having heard this.In every moment you only have one real choice: to be aware of the Self or to identify with the body and the mind. Self inquiry is such hard work. I held onto consciousness. Thats a good practise. page 59 Your ultimate need is to get established in the changeless peace of the Self. You follow the bhakti path if you want to but you should remember that its almost impossible for a devotee to judge whether he is making progress or not. The Bhakti path seems to be more sweet. Through that one sentence I attained a peace and a happiness that can never be explained in words. Treat them the same way. Go beyond it to the real peace which comes from being POST Page 84 of Final Talks 2 Quote What ever kind of thought arises. You will be the peace or the bliss rather than being the experiencer of it. the experiencer of that peace or bliss will not want the Self to subside into the Self and disappear. If you become attached to peaceful or blissful states you may lose your interest in the main quest. dont get attached to states of bliss or give them priority over the quest for Self. That means you are not the thought. ignore them. including the thought ' i am meditating'. To whom are these thoughts arising ? To You. It is good to feel blissful and peaceful but don’t indulge yourself in these states at the expense of self inquiry. what ever thoughts arise in that state wont affect you. not my business'. it will run away. if you experience temporary states of peace or bliss in the mind. in a split second . if you are the Self. If you realize the inner Self. the raising of thought will not disturb or distract you. POST Page 86: Final Talks 3: Quote Whatever thoughts come. if you realize that there is not an atom which is apart from Self. anything that is based on the notion that you are the mind or the body. and don't latch onto anything that is not the Self. You have to ignore anything that is connected to the body-mind idea. have the same reaction: 'Not me. POST Page 82 of final talks 4 Quote . Don’t get attached to mental peace.consciousness. if you can do this. IT can be a good thought or a bad thought. Remain as the Self. you will experience the real peace and bliss of the Self. You are the Self. All thoughts are distractiosn. darkness will not overcome you. Be the Self. nothing that happens to mind is 'you'. and none of it is your business. are concepts that can only arise when you believe that you are not the Self. There is nothing you can do about this flow. Post Page 292: living by the words of Bhagavan 7: Quote . bad thoughts. and it will not matter what comes up. You are the Self not some make-believe person who is having thoughts POST Page 82. this flow of thoughts need not be a problem. they will keep coming. Good thoughts. effort and practise . and any ideas you may have about them. Even the sequence "to whom has this thought come? To me" is based on ignorance of the truth. but at the same time. POST Page 86 : Final Talks 6: Quote Thoughts will come as long as the potential for them is inside you. Final Talks 5 Quote Remember .Its enough that you remember that the thoughts are not you. and when you believe that you have to do something to reach the Self.Sadhana. You dont have to worry about thoughts that rise up inside you. be the peace that is your real nature. its perpetuating an erroneous assumption that there is a person who is having troublesome thoughts. Why? Because its verbalising a state of ignorance. One day he met a man make the moment the truth he remembered when it on the me road happy who but asked I him why cant king!" his was real told identity. There is a story about someone the king he may be like able to help me thus. He thought . and you are aware of it right now. by giving some money" Once a king imagined that he was a poverty-striken peasant. who already recognized him. anywhere". He answered. AS: The meditation "I am not the body or the mind. I think that he can solve all my problems and The man. Spiritual seekers have a very strange habit: they are always looking for a way to reach. and then you run around looking for it as if it were something external to be reached or found. samadhi. POST Page 293-294 living by the words of bhagavan 8: Quote Q: Bhagavan said that repeating 'I am Self' or 'I am not the body' is an aid to enquiry but it does not constitute enquiry itself. " I am searching for the king. This is like running around looking for one's eyes with one's own eyes. dhyana and nishta. Do you need a new experience to prove that you exist? The feeling "I am existing" is the Self. "if I go and meet He searched for the king in many places but he could not find him anywhere.Giving up the identity with the body and the mind is tapas. "But you yourself as The king came to his senses and remembered who he was. you are not what you imagine youself ot be". They try many things because they cannot comprehend that they are already the Self. they all keep asking the guru for methods and routes to reach the place they are already are. His problems all ended the You may think that the king was fairly stupid but he had at least enough sense to recognize The guru may tell his disciples a thousand times "You are the self. said with some astonishment.discover. or cover it up with all kinds of false ideas. Ultimately he became very depressed because his search was not yeilding any results.experience. or realize the Self. to him. I am the immanent Self" is a great aid . Why should you imagine that it is some new experience to be discovered or found ? You are the Self right now. he find was him so depressed. You pretend that you are not experiencing it. attain. pg 281 10: . when one is able to abide in the Self directly. then meditation on the awareness "I am the all pervasive Self" is a great aid. one day this firm conviction will mature to the point where it becoems your direct experience. POST 9 Quote How to give up this false idea that mind is real ? Annamalai Swami Answers: the same way that you give up any wrong idea. Its true that he said that these repetitions are only an aid to self-enquiry. When the mind has become purified by this practise its easier to take it back to the source and keep it there. if you have firm conviction that this is the truth. Bhagavan often siad that we should read and study the Ribhu Gita regularly. 'Keeping the mind in the heart is self-enquiry'. Bhagavan said. POST Living by the Words of Bhagavan . you simply stop believing in it. one does not need aids like this. There is no mind. there is no mind. Bhagavan sat with us every day while we chanted extracts from Ribhu Gita which affirm the reality of the Self. In Ribhu Gita its said: "That Bhavana "I am not the body. i am not the mind. I am everything" is to be repeated again and again until it becomes natural state. keep telling yourself "i am not the mind. If you cannot do thys by asking "who am I?" or by taking the "I"-thought back to its source. But if this is not possible these practises can definitely aid. consciousness alone exists". I am not the mind. but they are very powerful aids. if this does not happen spontaneously when u hear the truth from a teacher. I am Brahman.as long as one is not able to do self inquiry properly or constantly. By practising this way the mind becomes more and more attuned to the reality. If you do this you are meditating on the Self. then just watch the mind with full attention. See how thoughts connect with each other and watch how this ghost called mind catches hold of your thoughts and says 'This is my thought'. become aware of it. But if you cannot stabilise in that consciousness because your vasanas are too strong and too active . you begin to understand the futility of all mental activities. unaffected by transient thoughts . Just give up the identifying with the mind and hold onto the Self. I am asking you the be the Self. I am everything' If you meditate in this way you will not be cooperating with the vasanas that are blocking the Self-awareness. What difficulties can arise from doing a simple practise like this ? POST Pg 282 of Living by the words of Bhagavan 11: Quote Doing any sadhana without first understanding that the individual self is non-existent is selfindulgence.Quote If you try to meditate without understanding that your real nature is Self. If you do not cooperate with the vasanas. Watch the ways of mind without identifying with them in any way. Feel that that is what you reall are. Bhagavan once said. If this method does not appeal to you .'Why all these maha yogas ? All these yogas are maya!' When I say. Its a form of spiritual entertainment in which the illusory "I" plays games with itself. your meditation practise will only lead you to more mental bondage. Be aware of the consciousness that is the origin of all your thoughts. It gives us an incentive to stay detached from all our thoughts. Watching the mind gives us the knowledge of the inner processes.the Self is all'. If you give your mind your full detached attention. Whenever the mind wanders. its beneficial to hold onto the thought 'I am Self. That is enough. sooner or later they are bound to leave you. Be still and cultivate the awareness 'I am the Self. Be aware of what remains when thoughts stop. all you have to do is remain still' To realize the Self you dont actually have to do anything except be still. it gives us the ability to remain as consciousness . 'To keep the mind in the Self. Saint Tayumanuvar once said. not think about it. Ultimately if we try hard enough. and Self alone. 'Meditate on the Self' . seeking out useless or unnecessary things or ideas which will ultimately create more misery for itself. Be that consciousness. Watch the mind wandering here and there . Post Living by the words of bhagavan . head directly for the self. POST Pg 260 of Living by the words of Bhagavan 13: Quote You must generate the conviction. I am that consciousness which remains unchanged and unaffected by these appearances and disappearances ". Hold onto it as tenaciously as you can and dont let anything or anyone loosen your grip. Dont be statisfied with rituals and other kindergarten techniques.: The little self is something that only appears to be real. that? AS. "I am the all-pervasive consciousness in which all bodes and minds in the world are appearing and disappearing. If you understand that it has no real existence it will disappear.' how disappear. of living by the words of bhagavan 12 Quote The best mantra is "i am the self. . If you can convince yourself. 'This little self is really But me. everything is my Self. If you are serious.: not Q. Self will eventually reveal itself to you.POST pg 274 .: What is the easiest way to be it to free of will do the 'little self'? Annamalai Swami: Stop identifying with it. Thats all you need to do. leaving behind it the experience of the real and only Self. Stabilise yourself in that conviction. Everything is one" If you keep this in your mind all the time. conversations 14: Quote Q. Q. Q. even maya. why can't I see the Self clearly ? Why is it hidden from me ? AS: Because you are looking in the wrong direction. AS. If.. This is not so. Your vasanas and all the wrong ideas you have about yourself are blocking and hiding the experience of the real Self.Understand that it has no real existence and it will stop troubling you. The Self is the Awareness or consciousness in which the seeing and the experiencing take place. Try to remember the analogy of the rope which looks like a snake in twilight. I am everything. If this is so. you will not be concerned about ways and means of getting rid of it.: The desire for assistance is part of your problem. 'I am the Self. ' I have seen the paper'. Don't make the mistake of imagining that there is a goal to be reached or attained. If you only see the rope the snake is not there. If you can understand that this 'little self' never at any time had any existence outside your imagination. I am not sure that i can generate this conviction by myself. through enquiry. it is always realized. The best way to (stop believing the wrong ideas about yourself) is to replace them with ideas which more accurately reflect the real state of affairs. I cannot break this habit merely by thinking 'I am not this 'little self''.. . Not only that . If you don't identify with these wrong ideas. If you think like this you will start looking for methods to practice and people to help you. Consciousness is universal. It is only when we identify with and limit ourselves to the body and the mind that this false sense of self is born. Even if you don't see the Self. your Self-nature will not be hidden from you. I am Brahman. Then they sau . You have the idea that the Self is something that you see or experience .. The Self is always attained. This just perpetuates the problem you are trying to end. you go to the source of the 'little self'. POST 15: Q: You say that everything is the Self. the Self is still there.: But I am very accustomed to feel 'I am this 'little self' '. cultivate the strong awareness.: This 'little self' will only give way to the real Self if you meditate constantly. AS. they have only seen the letters without the paper. But really they haven't seen the paper . why cant I see the Self clearly ? If this is so. I am That.'.: It is all very clear but I feel I need some help.. Bhagavan some times remarked humorously: "People just open a newspaper and glance through it. reach or discover. (Then) the question of how to kill the snake disappears. There is no limitation or 'little self' in it.. it is not something that you have to seek.you know that there never was a snake there. you find that it dissolves into nothingness. Instead. If you see the rope as snake the real nature of the rope is hidden from you. You cannot wish it away with a few stray thoughts. but people always forget the paper while they are reading the words " . "And how does one practise nirvikalpa samadhi ? How many different kinds of samadhi are there ?" . etc. "I am meditating". "Can one practise sahaja samadhi right from the beginning?" Bhagavan replied by saying that one could. Stay firmly seated in the Self and dont allow the mind to identify with anything that the body does. I asked. all thoughts like these are I am the body thoughts. In that State the thought . he said. With this kind of partial vision its easy to come to the conclusion that all forms are unconnected with each other and separate from the peron who sees them." said Bhagavan. Dont give these "I am the body" ideas any attention. "I am Self". "Mediation will go on without our effort. You divide your life up into different activities: "I am eating". Get rid of all these ideas and replace them with the single thought . If people were to be aware of the consciousness instead of the forms that appear in it. Pg: 265-6 This POST of Annamalai is 271-2. Recognition. A few weeks later I asked him another question about it. Continuous meditation is necessary for all those who want to stay in the Self. Bhagavan answered by saying . "I must eat now". "I will go to sleep now". Learn to recognize them when they arise and learn to ignore them or deny them. Quote "Does Samadhi mean that one is unaware of everything ?" . That consciousness is the Self that you are looking for. I asked. I then asked Bhagavan about periods in meditation when I was only aware of an allpervasive blankness. "Is this good?" Bhagavan did not seem to approve of all these states. " In that state meditation will always be going on. You can be that consciousness but you can never see it because its not something that is separate from you. "No. Hold onto that idea and dont let it go. If you have ideas like these you are still identifiying with the body. "In the beginning". "I am working". they would realize that all forms are just appearances which manifest within the one invisible consciousness. "It is good if meditators meditate with Self Awareness". The state of Sahaja Samadhi contined to intrigue me. 'I am meditating' or 'I am not meditating' will not occur". Swami Living 's living by called by the the words of of bhagavan. I asked. "Sometimes nothing is seen". pg 234 of Living by the words of bhagavan. they ignore the screen itself. I said. "I will have a bath now". bhagavan 16:pg words Continuous inhalation and exhalation are necessary for continuation of life. That is Samadhi" "Then what is Sahaja Samadhi ?".Bhagavan would then use this analogy to show that while people see the names and forms that appear on the screen of consciousness. "But how to practise it ". POST 17 Here is a conversation between annamalai swami and Ramana . "not many kinds. it is the bhoga vasanas which determine the kind of lifestyle a jnani will lead. In the absence of mind he knows himself only as consciousness. and because he has no likes and dislikes. some may study the sastras while others may remain illiterate. some may sit in silence. The bhoga vasanas differ from jnani to jnani. he is no longer able to identify himself with the body. That body will continue to live. The jnani's body carries out all the acts which are destined for it. some jnanis may accumulate wealth. and the Jnani will continue to be aware of it. but they do have the power to make the body behave in certain ways. he will also be aware of the thoughts and vasanas that arise in that body. Said Bhagavan . POST Annamalai Swami pg 24 of Final Talks 19: . its a fact that the body is still alive. But because the jnani makes no judgements about what is good or bad. he can witness all its activities without getting involved in them in any way."There is only one kind of Samadhi". while you are still making judgements about what is good and what is bad. living by the with words of bhagavan : conversations Annamalai Swami Quote Nothing can cause bondage for the Jnani because his mind is dead. Because the mind is dead. some vasanas are embraced whole heartedly while others are rejected as being undesirable. When vasanas rise in ordinary people who still identify with the body and the mind. But even though he knows that he is not the body. because he knows that he is not the body. that is why they differ from jnani to jnani. that is why its some times said that for the jnani there are bhoga vasanas but no bandha vasanas. some may get married and raise families but others may become celibate monks. they cause likes and dislikes. until its own karma is exhausted. These likes and dislikes generate desires and fears which in turn produce more karma. Because the jnani is aware of the body. he is not creating any new karma for himself. there is no possibility of any new karma being created. There will be no rebirth for the jnani because once the mind has been destroyed. The jnani is aware of the consequences of these vasanas without identifying with them. Permanently abiding in the Self without forgetting it is Sahaja Samadhi. None of these vasanas has the power to cause bondage for him because he never identifies with them. Because of this he never falls back into samsara again. when new karma has been created like this. The vasanas arise because of habits and practices of previous life times. To remain temporarily subsided in the reality without any thought is nirvikalpa Samadhi. The body of the jnani enjoys and experiences thses vasanas although the jnani himself is not affected by them. you are identifying with the mind and making new karmas for yourself. Both will give the same happiness" Post 18: This is Page From 267. it means that you have to take another birth to enjoy it. Clouds come and go in the sky but the appearance and disappearance of the clouds doesn't affect the sky. not its ephemeral contents. he further explains: Quote The waking state which you take to be real. like space. If you can resist the impulse to claim each and every thought as your own. POST 20: When the mind appears every morning don't jump to the usual conclusion. by direct experience. . you will come to a startling conclusion: you will discover that you are the consciousness in which the thoughts appear and disappear. See it as a dream. They will not be a problem for you any more. gradually you will cease to identify yourself with it …………………………………………. watch these thoughts come and go without identifying with them in any way. Come to the conclusion. Your real nature is like the sky. you will discover that the mind is only an illusion which appears through ignorance or misperception. Like the snake which appears in the rope. You dont have to supress thoughts or be absolutely thoughtless to abide as the SElf. and if you have no thoughts . watch all the thoughts come and go. Just remain like the sky and let thought-clouds come and go. Recognize that it is just an expansion of your thoughts. the substratum on which this vast believable dream is projected. Just be the Self at all times. You can have that experience if you give up your life-long habit of inventing an 'I' which claims all thoughts as 'mine'. Bad thoughts make bad dreams and good thoughts make good dreams. that you are really consciousness itself. "This is me. you dont dream at all. You are allowed to run free." Instead. You want some experience which will convince you that what I am saying is true. Your vasanas sprout and expand miraculously . these thoughts are mine. you must understand that your dream is also the Self. In this state you will know that everything that appears to you is just a dream. Dont lose sight of the Self. creating a whole waking-dream world for you. Be conscious of yourself as consciousness alone. in pg 25. But even if you do dream. then the thoughts and the dreams they produce can do on. IF you hold onto the knowledge "I am Self". These dreams are our thoughts made manifest. is just an unfolding of dream that has appeared to you and minifested in front of you on account of some hidden desires or fears. and you wont get entangled in them.Quote Everything we see in this waking state is a dream. If you cultivate this attitude of indifference towards the mind. you will know that the dreams are laso the Self. If you know that even your waking and sleeping dreams are the Self. he was given charge of constructing more buildings for the Ashram. Once he expelled all the female workers so that he can avoid them. At last he thought of taking Maharshi’s help. After some days Annamalai Swami was again disturbed by sexual thoughts to the extent that he could not eat or sleep properly for three days. Amongst the construction workers there were some very attractive females and occasionally. . Annamalai Swami was totally captivated by her beauty and lust. Raman Maharshi laughingly said “all saints are striving only for this”. But Raman Maharshi stressed him to employ them. Suddenly Raman Maharshi came out and asked Annamalai Swami to stand on a particular rock and Maharshi started conversing with him. The sun was at its peak and Annamalai Swami was not wearing any sandals. But one afternoon Annamalai Swami was sitting in his room. Once he told Ramana Maharshi that he doesn’t want Moksha but he wants to get rid of the desire for women. when he saw a beautiful woman going to meet Raman Maharshi.” …………………………………. Ramana Maharshi abruptly ended conversation and left him. You are not the body nor the mind. Meditate on your Self and all desires will leave you. The thought will leave you on its own accord.Speaks on Sexuality Annamalai Swami is an Disciple of Raman Maharshi. So soon his feet starts burning from heat but he could not change his feet as it was an order from Maharshi. Annamalai Swami were attracted to them. Annamalai Swami was some times troubled by sexual thoughts but some how he used to avoid the thoughts. The pain in his feet started increasing and suddenly a thought arises in him that the pain he is experiencing has replaced the sexual desire.Annamalai Swami. From Raman Maharshi answer. Annamalai Swami was assured that he was not alone in this suffering. When Annamalai Swami was staying at the Ashram of Sri Raman Maharshi. you are the Self.. Maharshi advised him “Why you pay attention to evil thought? Why don’t you meditate? To whom does this thought came. As the thought entered his mind. After some time when that woman came out of room. As soon as ignorance comes. that is also ignorance. ruling me during all my countless incarnations! Glory to you who have put on an external form to instruct me. 'To whom does this ignorance come?' A strong determination to pursue enquiry in this way will dissolve all doubts.' The Guru knows that without vigilance. If we take the mirage to be real water. is the highest return you can render me. Q: Why is this experience not enough? Annamalai Swami: If vasanas are still there. Vigilance may be needed to maintain it. While they are there. There is a verse in Kaivalya Navaneeta that Bhagavan often quoted. an initial experience of the Self may slip away. I do not see how I can repay your grace for having liberated me. they will rise up again and the experience will be lost. It speaks of the need for vigilance even after the Self has been experienced for the first time. you are the reality remaining as my inmost Self. that is ignorance. abidance in the Self may not be firm and irreversible. you must question it. there is always the possibility that we may again take the unreal to be real. Similarly.Annamalai Swami: Initially. By questioning 'Who am I?' and by constantly meditating. one . In this verse the disciple is speaking to his Guru: 'Lord. uncertainty and wrong knowledge] obstructing your experience. Glory! Glory to your holy feet!' The Guru replies: 'To stay fixed in the Self without the three kinds of obstacles [ignorance. if we take the unreal body to be the Self. As long as vasanas continue to exist they will rise and cover the reality. Bhagavan: What we have to attain and what is desired by everyone is endless happiness. The following questions were asked by an aristocratic. obscuring awareness of it. it is not something to be sought or attained as a new experience. Although we seek to attain it in various ways. Annamalai Swami recorded conversations with Bhagavan in the late 1930s. edited by David Godman …………………………. Although we are always experiencing it. It is within us and nowhere else. when you know that the rope of reality is all that exists. Final Talks.: What is the truth that I have to attain? Please explain it and show it to me. As often as you become aware of them. Our real nature is the 'I' feeling which is always experienced by everyone. When you know that the snake of the mind never existed. Q.comes to the clarity of being. Bhagavan's answers are a succinct summery of his practical teachings. ~ Annamalai Swami. question. doubts and fears will not trouble you again. our minds are . 'To whom do they come?' This continuous enquiry will establish you in your own Self and you will have no further problems.looking American lady. 'I am this body'. why did so many sadhanas come to be created? Bhagavan: The sadhanas came to be formed only to get rid of the thought that the Self is something to be newly attained. The reality of the Self will only shine if all these thoughts are removed.: If that is so. thinking in ignorance it is something apart from us. Afterwards. The root of the illusion is the thought which ignores the Self and thinks instead. Q. If it changes after a while you will know that other thoughts have Q.: I am now sitting peacefully without the thought 'I am this body'.: What is the way to not get rid of other gone. what remains is only Brahmananda. This is like a person saying with his own tongue that he has no tongue. thoughts? Bhagavan: They can only be removed through the powerful effect of the enquiry. Is this the state of reality? Bhagavan: This state must remain as it is without any change. After this thought rises it expands in a moment into several thousand thoughts and conceals the Self. always seeking it. Q. 'To whom have these thoughts come' . the bliss of Brahman.wandering. ………………. On drinking that water. it is true that Bhagavan literally taught me how to read and write. and received his blessings. I then went to Sri Bhagavan. However. I felt speechless and senseless. In the course of my work. When I came to the Ashram there was just a shed over the Mother's shrine and Bhagavan was seated there. "Even fools have become extremely wise by coming to Bhagavan. Chadwick did . I went up to him and washed his feet with water. J. [Before coming to Tiruvannamalai] I had had a dream in which Bhagavan was coming down the Hill." I am sure that Muruganar was referring to me when he sang this song. Bhagavan only laughed in reply. which happened to be a full moon day.Jayaraman was the interviewer and James Hartel the videographer. I once overheard Muruganar sing a line from a Tamil verse. Some of this interview is featured in the Guru Ramana. I hastened to Tiruvannamalai the very same day. I also saw Gopal Rao. An Interview with Annamalai Swami The following is transcribed from a November 1989 videotaped interview with Annamalai Swami. I chanced to meet Seshadri Swami near the Rettai Pillaiyar Koil. When I arrived at Tiruvannamalai. Bhagavan was coming from the Hill. Major Chadwick When Chadwick arrived in Tiruvannamalai he mistook me for Bhagavan and prostrated before me. One day somebody showed me the book Nan Yar (Who Am I?). When I came here. Muruganar was astonished that I did not even know the fundamentals of Advaitic teachings. who was building the Old Hall. in favor of Chadwick. I had read a little before coming here. which means. Also. I then took him to Bhagavan. When I asked Bhagavan what bondage and liberation meant. close to the big temple. I saw Bhagavan's picture and was instantly captivated. Coming to Bhagavan I came from Tondanguruchi where I had a stall to distribute water to the needy. I was asked to vacate the room I had been occupying at that time. but nothing else happened like in the dream. His Living Presence video production. "This whole place is going to be very active with many buildings. He wouldn't be happy and would say. That is when he came out with his intentions and said.not like this and said that if I vacated he would not stay at the Ashram. Bhagavan would indicate with only a few words or signs. the mason thought that Bhagavan was mad as he was just asking him the same question again and again. "So you are showing off your bhakti. It was then agreed that the two of us would share the room. sculpture. or He would not come near me. It was in very subtle ways that Bhagavan extracted work from the devotees. But that wasn't Bhagavan's way. I tried to remove all three. "Go and see what the mason is doing. The mason was a little annoyed. Chadwick gave me an umbrella. He appreciated my hard work and sincerity. I will never come near you. when Bhagavan came by. I was in a dilemma because it was Bhagavan who insisted that I behave normally." The irony is that some others in the Ashram used to scoff at me for wearing these in Bhagavan's presence. Bhagavan used to say. Then Bhagavan came near me and chided me. Thenamma Paati asked Bhagavan how I could apply my mind to supervise all the construction work that was going on and still be devoted to Bhagavan." So I went there.Someone can attend to the work here. One day. During my early days with Bhagavan. "If you behave like this on seeing me. I even used to learn a little bit of English from Chadwick. . but made the same reply. and very gentle. saying. He was very subtle. . After sometime. You go and supervise that work. Bhagavan taught me everything. Why not behave normally even when I come. he once told me. or just ordered me to go and do it. If you got up from your seat when Bhagavan passed by." Construction Work I knew nothing about masonry work before coming here." Some of His comments were hard to believe because no indication of such things was found then. When Bhagavan asked me to go and see what the mason was doing for the third time. Although my father was proficient in masonry." I reflected that Bhagavan could have told me this in the first instance itself. Bhagavan again asked me to go and see what the mason was doing. shy. I now asked Bhagavan why he kept repeating the same question. Bhagavan laughed and remarked that I should have been an engineer in my previous birth. astrology and other fine arts. This is how I became very friendly with Chadwick. shaded eyeglasses and sandals to use when I was supervising or working in the hot sun. I knew none of these when I came to Bhagavan. I complied. asked him what he was doing and conveyed the reply to Bhagavan. Once. but if that's difficult for you. "I thought I could make that request. One day I was feeling tired and was reclining against a wall. "I'm afraid to even look at you. the word 'padi' stands for both 'measure' as well as for 'steps'. As I got up. On all cupboards and other furniture. and whenever I had difficulty. Though I had pain in my head. Bhagavan came and instructed me. and it can be seen at the store entrance even today. The same thing happened with the arch of the Ashram entrance. don't bother with it. even if that should mean sacrificing my body. Bhagavan would encourage me to take up such work. Tiruvannamalai" had to be written very neatly. which was to give up the 'I am-the-body' idea. not getting enough rest. I honestly felt that I was overworked. Bhagavan came up to me and said. Bhagavan wanted me to make an image of Arunachala in cement." This was of course in jest but it also meant that I could understand Bhagavan's subtle instructions and follow them meticulously. Bhagavan was very particular about doing things meticulously and perfectly. I thought he wanted to know how many measures of cement I was ordering. Now. give hints. Bhagavan came back and said. In those days money and materials were scarce. Bhagavan gave me a playful slap and said. and personally massaged my head for a long time. Bhagavan was standing there and giving me instructions. "I'm asking about one padi. in Tamil. Bhagavan once again gave me a few hints and I managed to get it right the third time. I had been asked to repair some dilapidated steps behind the Dining Hall. A little later. you would construct a structure there. "How many padis?" meaning how many steps I was constructing. The three dimensional aspect is also visible on account of the cement being plastered accordingly. When it did not come out properly. Bhagavan would come. Bhagavan asked Madhavaswami to bring zambak (medicinal ointment). I banged my head hard against the tap." On another occasion. This was great appreciation showered upon me by Sri Bhagavan. ." I felt badly about the thoughts I had entertained and resolved that in the future I would definitely undertake and fulfill any of Bhagavan's requests. and you are answering about another. "If I would just look in one direction. Once I was about to construct some steps when Bhagavan came and hit me three times. He said. it did not come out the second time as well. the name "Sri Ramanasramam. I kept reminding myself of Bhagavan's teaching. I was feeling a little dejected. just like printed letters.When the storeroom was being built. I was building some steps near the water tap. and encourage me to do it perfectly. Bhagavan asked me. I asked Ramaswami Pillai to get three or four measures of cement. Bhagavan insisted that I should draw the image of Arunachala on the wall of the Ashram Store. It was a solemn pledge I made to myself. I also thanked the tap for giving me this opportunity to receive a massage from the golden this opportunity to receive a massage from the golden hands of Sri Bhagavan. However." I asked Him why that should be so. Also. Bhagavan told them. Disturbing Ants One day after lunch we noticed lots of ants in the Old Hall disturbing the devotees. Bhagavan used to pretend to be asleep when we did this. He said that it was freedom from this desire that all great people had sought and suffered for. i. it is for the sake of others. Bhagavan asked me to inspect the area and do the needful. but just wanted to be saved from the attractions of women. I was entrusted with the mason's work. Madhavaswami. Upon hearing this.In the earlier days. I was wondering what reply Bhagavan would give. I explained that it would be jivahimsa to kill hundreds and thousands of ants by stepping upon them or by closing the opening through which they came out. I once told Bhagavan that I didn't even desire moksha." He then quoted from Chapter thirteen of Bhagavad Gita where Krishna says that even killing is permitted if it is for the benefit of the world. Rangaswami and I used to massage the soles of Bhagavan's feet with oil. the women used a large white cloth as a partition between them and us.e. In the days when I still used to live in the Ashram. When the Dining Hall was being built. Why should you segregate him like this?" Chinnaswami. yet when we went out. a brahmin by the wish of Sri Bhagavan. sealed the entrance and cemented it. and put our heads against His feet to receive His grace after completing the massage. As I was not a brahmin. And since at that time I felt that whatever bhakti I had. Bhagavan used to dig the earth with a huge gaddapare (crowbar) and Santhamma used to mix mortar with water. I cleared the area of ants. I was jumping all over in order to avoid crushing them. When I went and lifted a stone. I was feeling that Bhagavan did not want me to stay there. we had to stop this practice of ours. While we worked on the construction Thenamma and Subbu-lakshmiamma used to do the cooking nearby. . "You are not doing it for yourself. However. so he has become an ichcha brahmin". on hearing this said. had evaporated. He said. "Bhagavan says 'our Annamalai'. Fleeing to Polur Bhagavan always taught jnanamarga.. "Why are you doing this? It's only our Annamalai. no one ever talked about jnanamarga or even bhaktimarga. When Bhagavan asked me what I was doing. when large crowds started coming to the Ashram regularly. millions of ants rushed out. This helped me regain some of my strength. I then plucked a little flower in order to toss it up to divine if I should go back to the Ashram or leave Bhagavan permanently and go out as a wandering mendicant. and unless that is finished. I did that in a tank just outside Polur for a while before leaving for the samadhi of Vithoba in Polur. "How could you go away? You have so much work to do here. I had heard that if one stood chest deep in water. I felt that Bhagavan was quoting the song from the supplement to the forty verses which . I went straight to Bhagavan and narrated all that had happened. while the ticket examiner checked all other passengers. However. Similarly. None wished to give me alms. That's when the owner of a small roadside hotel invited me in and fed me sumptuously with great reverence. Besides. I begged at Nair Mangalam's place and many other places with no luck. The flower toss-up indicated that I should go back to Bhagavan and I began walking back promptly. All these events discouraged me. he totally ignored me. how could you go?" I was standing near Bhagavan and He gave me a steady look of Grace. In fact one person wondered why I had to leave a holy place like Tiruvannamalai and wander elsewhere. he also gave me two rupees for my travel expenses. the stationmaster. a lady took pity at my plight and offered me two glasses full of thin gruel. I took this as a good omen and a vindication of my decision to return to Bhagavan. In the afternoon on the third day. and was weak and exhausted by the time I reached Polur. let me through saying that he had already checked my ticket. who usually checks all the tickets. when I got down at Tiruvannamalai. I boarded the train to Tiruvannamalai without a ticket. Bhagavan graciously said. it would aid in withstanding hunger.I walked without any food for two days. upon rising every morning one should look at the sun in one's right hand. and gave me another look of Grace. and Valli the deer. In the process. Bhagavan tried to prevent the dog from harming the squirrel by interposing his stick in between them. though Bhagavan had not uttered a word. The crow was very fortunate to die in His hands. the bird had by then recovered so much that it flew off. so also Jacki the dog. suffering bruises all over his body. and at a Linga in the left. squirrels. where is the need for following the usual injunctions expected of a seeker. He massaged its head. In fact. Tincture was applied all over. Bhagavan personally attended to the bird and treated it with zambak and other oils. When the samadhi was being built for Valli. That gave me great confidence and I declared in the presence of Bhagavan that I would stay put and do whatever Bhagavan asked of me. like going on a yatra. What shortcomings can you face in your life?" Animals Bhagavan was extraordinarily kind towards birds. The next day when He asked me to bring the dove to Him. Once. as Bhagavan was descending the steps near the Valli deer's samadhi. As I was interested in following this injunction. it was suggested that I could have a Linga tattooed on my hand. died in His hands. and kept the dove for the whole day. On seeing this Sivalinga tied to my left arm. Bhagavan used to repeatedly tell me. Many people used to witness this with awe and wonder. The Tamil religious calendar says that. There are many instances when Bhagavan showered grace by his look. which causes a burning sensation. He showed visible partiality towards animals over humans. etc. remaining? in mouna. he saw a dog chasing a squirrel. dogs and peacocks. Bhagavan repeatedly said. Bhagavan smiled at me. I was present when the crow.means "When you have the association of great men. Once a big dove fell down on being attacked by a vulture. etc. "You have the Lord tied to your hand." This song came to my mind. Bhagavan was particularly interested in rituals for the samadhis of the birds and animals and wanted special pujas to be done for such samadhis with offerings of milk. and there are even photographs of Bhagavan with plaster all . and helped me complete the samadhi. He stumbled and fell down the steps. But my father preferred a Linga itself to be tied to my left hand. "God is in your own hands. towards which Bhagavan showed extraordinary kindness. cows. I was very thin and could easily go inside the tiny dome to do the plastering work. What more do you want?" It was my father who had this Linga tied to my arm. Bhagavan used to stand outside and hand me chuna and other material. Plaster was applied on all the wounds. and that I should be released from this strain. <1-. realizes He who has no desires has no But where there is There will be ever-increasing When desire. "Oho! one sambhar! That's very good. Munagala Venkatramaiah gave me shelter at Palakottu and I cooked my own food. sorrow's sorrow. Bhagavan underwent such suffering even for animals. yes. if I told him that I made just one sambhar. Bhagavan used to occasionally inquire about my cooking and made encouraging comments. or what I would do for food. A little later I went into the bathroom when Bhagavan was being given an oil bath." Bhagavan was comparing his receiving food at the Ashram. We all have witnessed these phases in Bhagavan's life. Yes.mp3. Annanamalayar has Mandavapadi. earth. One day Yogi Ramaya was accompanying Bhagavan and told him that I had become very weak from so much hard work. For instance. When I left the Ashram. "It will only be like this.over His body. I went up the hill to meet Bhagavan and requested permission to stay in Palakottu. away. that's good for you. Madhavaswami.2 --> No Desires. remarked that many sadhus are known to take ganja (hemp) and asked him how one would feel on consuming ganja. Moving to Palakottu I moved to Palakottu during the time when the Dining Hall was being built under my supervision." Once when I had more than one eatable to offer Bhagavan. which stops at each Mandap and is offered food." Resolving to put an end to the tension and mental suffering. he should be given freedom. "Yes. Bhagavan also said. desire sorrows. . His attendant. as well as at other places. even here on It is the nature of desire never to be But he who utterly gives it up Eternal Fulfillment at that very moment." I felt such a great joy when he held me that I handed over the keys of my room to Bhagavan immediately and left for Palakottu. Bhagavan then suddenly got up and holding me by the shoulder. to the idol of Annamalai in the Arunachaleswara Temple. "Yes. fulfilled. dies Undying bliss prevails. No Sorrow sorrow. said. he remarked. "Just like Annamalai. Bhagavan said." and he repeated it thrice. Bhagavan had come to this place and even had some food cooked by me. he would say. I had no thoughts about where I would stay. He said in a stern voice. This means . a lady came from Ramaswami. after dinner.100. Thus. Once Bhagavan visited me when I was removing the scaffolding from my house. stayed here for a month.Whenever I was engaged in construction work at the Ashram or at Palakottu. not even to visit the Ashram. My friend Arumugham and I were planning to build a small thatched shed for me to live in. there were films being shown at the Ashram. "So you have come to see the shadow of Bhagavan. without saying so explicitly. He beckoned me to him and said in a very strong and stern voice. "Oho! So you have to remove this scaffolding for the sake of money?" and went away. lime. He then asked many leading questions related to the design of the house. "Does this mean that you do not like to meet me here. Do Not Move Out One day He told me very clearly and sternly. That same evening. "Don't move out anywhere. I have never left Palakottu since. Shadow Bhagavan Once. One night I saw Bhagavan completely enclosed in a piece of cloth. along with lime-making equipment for a small lime factory. and stay till about 9:00 o'clock. except for the nose. Bhagavan conveyed to Arumugham the design he had in mind for my house. including one on Bhagavan. which was served at 7:30. Bhagavan heard our discussions from afar and inquired about our plans from Arumugham. he said." I felt that Bhagavan was telling me not to move out of Palakottu. When I arrived and prostrated before Bhagavan. along with help from Vaikuntavasagar. This look of Bhagavan made Arumugham a big contractor years later. as I could not complete the construction for want of money. or is it that you don't want me to come to the Ashram at all?" Bhagavan remained silent. "He who. bricks. I wanted to see the film. and donated Rs. Stay put here and don't move to the next house or even the next room. Bhagavan would inspect my work and instruct me. This house was completed with that money. When I told Bhagavan the reason. "Will you use mortar. I asked him." After moving to Palakottu I used to come to Bhagavan every day at around eight at night. "Will the house have an upper floor? Will there be a mortared top?" etc. I was nearing the garden thinking about Bhagavan's directive to me to stay put at Palakottu when I heard Him call me.?" he asked. I shall tell you the story of how this house was designed. Arumugham settled for that very plan and bought 4000 bricks the next day. At about 9 o'clock I left the Hall. despite the right spiritual maturity. like a son with his father. I used to converse freely with Bhagavan. thinks that he is different from the Lord will reach the same lower state as does a non-believer. etc. "Why have you come to see me? You have happiness.that you no longer have the real Bhagavan in you and have hence come to see this shadow-Bhagavan. Bhagavan also said. why can’t I see the Self clearly? Why is it hidden from me? Annamalai Swami: Because you are looking in the wrong direction. There can be no words or pictures without the paper. and that Bhagavan wanted me to avoid the entire society. You have the idea that the Self is something that you see or experience. Then they say. after this incident." This touched me very deeply. but people always forget the paper while they are reading the words. One day. Even if you don’t see the Self. On the Self Question: You say that everything is the Self. but after a lot of reflection I realized that when one is away from society. With this kind of partial vision it is easy to come to the conclusion that all forms are unconnected with each other and separate from the person who sees them." So I interpreted it to mean that I should be alone. I went up the hill wanting to meet Bhagavan when he returned from his walk. "Ananda is not what you get from somewhere else. “I have seen the paper”. the Self is still there. This is not so. ……………………… Annamalai Swami. The Self is the awareness or the consciousness in which the seeing and the experiencing take place. You have to follow your own self.” Bhagavan would then use this analogy to show that while people see the names and forms that appear on the screen of consciousness. If people were to be aware of the consciousness instead of the forms that appear in it." I couldn't understand his words then. they have only seen the letters and pictures that are on it. you have happiness. If you follow somebody else's path. That consciousness is the Self that you are looking for. You can be that consciousness but you can never see it because it is not something that is separate from you. they ignore the screen itself. one has peace. This is how I interpreted His words. But really they haven’t seen the paper. Go within. ……………… Sat Sangha Salon . He again looked at me sternly and said. they would realise that all forms are just appearances which manifest within the one indivisible consciousness. even maya. it will only lead you to destruction. That alone will lead you to Ananda. Bhagavan sometimes remarked humorously: “People just open a newspaper and glance through it. If this is so. SKIP TO CONTENT       HOME AB OUT J E AN KLE IN B AB A ME HE R OS HO O. Someone once said to him: ‘If I drop this fan. taking my own case. If I remember the Self. 2013 · 2:37 PM ↓ Jump to Comments Only One Real Choice – Annamalai Swami Question: Bhagavan (Ramana Maharshi) once remarked that free will is non-existent. is this God’s will. is this also God’s will? Or. will that be an act that has always been destined to happen in this moment?’ And Bhagavan replied. as individuals. or is it individual effort? . and that as a consequence. ‘It will be a predestined act’. nothing happens that is not God’s will. because we.ME DIT AT ION S ANGHA JUNE 10. that all our activities are predetermined and that our only real choice is either to identify with the body that is performing the actions or with the underlying Self in which the body appears. I assume that these predestined acts are all ordained by God. have no power to deviate from God’s ordained script. is this God’s will? And if I forget to remember at a certain moment. A question arises out of this. if I make an effort to listen to the sound ‘I-I. ‘All is one. He said that you have the freedom either to identify with the body and its activities.’ or ‘I should not do that. or you can identify with the Self and have the understanding that the body is performing its predestined activities. You yourself are making that choice every second of your life. a great power takes you over and runs your life for you. ‘I must do this. you choose to spend all your time with people whose minds are always full of bad thoughts. but it is not something that mind that still sees distinctions can practice. In circumstances such as these you don’t say. Forgetfulness or non-forgetfulness is not a part of your destiny. it puts you in the right place at the right time. but that doesn’t mean that you have to put yourself in dangerous or health-threatening places. their mental energy and vibrations will start to seep into you. This power takes you over so completely. God did not make you forget the Self. I tell you regularly. So. The ego that thinks. In daily life one still has to discriminate and make distinctions. If you spend time in the proximity of a jnani. then use your discrimination wisely. When you have become one with the Self. I could smell the stench of the sewage even though I was a long way away. . It looks after your body. his peace will sink into you to such an extent that you will find yourself in a state of peace. Annamalai Swami: I once went for a walk near the housing board buildings [government flats that were built in the 1970s about 300 metres from Annamalai Swami’s ashram]. You can choose to sit in a flower garden and enjoy the scent of the blooms. instead. It was your forgetfulness and your lack of vigilance that caused the light to go out. Advaita may be the ultimate experience. So I say. I stayed away from it because I didn’t want to be nauseated by the bad smell. the light goes out. but one can’t treat everything in the world equally. If you are not in this state. Your thoughts were elsewhere. -Annamalai Swami Discrimination – Annamalai Swami Question: ‘All is one’ may be the truth. it makes you say the right things to the people you meet. while you still have an ego. Everything is the Self. and the power of discrimination that goes with it. don’t blame God or God’s will. It is something you can choose from moment to moment. use it to inhale the fragrance that you find in the presence of an enlightened being.’ If this is not your experience. If you have an oil lamp and you forget to put oil in it. and in doing so forget the Self. animated and sustained by the power of the Self. you no longer have any ability to decide or discriminate. or predestination.’ and paddle through the sewage. In every moment you only have one real choice: to be aware of the Self or to identify with the body and the mind. The Self simply animates you and makes you do all the things that need to be done. If.Annamalai Swami: Forgetfulness of the Self happens because of non-enquiry. If you choose the latter course. Everything is the Self. ‘You are the Self. There was a sewage trench on one side of the building. ‘Remove the forgetfulness through enquiry’. pretending that ‘all is one’ may get you into trouble. The knowledge ‘everything is the Self’ may be there. That is what Bhagavan said. They were not on tending the lamp.’ is no longer there. or you can go down to that trench I told you about and make yourself sick by inhaling the fumes there. I had a great feeling of physical relief and relaxation. I was wondering when you would come. Simultaneously. In that state you won’t need it and you won’t miss it. I asked for permission to stay. "If you give up identifying with the body and meditate on the Self. Realising the Self is the only useful and worthy activity in this life. the Self will take care of everything and you won’t have to worry about anything anymore. a part of the dream I had repeated itself in real life. When I sat down and Bhagavan gazed at me in silence for about 10-15 minutes." As I was pondering over these remarks."I was waiting for you. so keep the body in good repair till that goal is achieved. In 1928. . you won’t be able to because the mind that previously did the worrying. That night I had a dream in which I saw the Maharshi walking from the lower slopes of the hill towards the Ashram. After being closely involved in many construction projects for ten years under direct supervision of Sri Ramana. In fact. Next morning I decided to go and have his darshan . I saw Bhagavan walk down the hill as I had seen in the dream. which was granted and I got a job as Bhagavan's attendant. But I was delighted to hear him speak like this because it seemed to indicate that it was my destiny to stay with him. Afterwards. a wandering sadhu gave me a copy of Upadesa Undiyar by Sri Ramana. an intense desire arose within me to go and see him. but it is also potentially harmful. -Annamalai Swami Ramana Maharshi Devotee Annamalai Swami (Extracted from ‘Face to Face with Sri Ramana Maharshi’) Annamalai Swami (1906-1995) since his childhood had a natural inclination towards spirituality. He came to Sri Ramana in 1928 and got a job with the Ashram. he shifted to Palakottu near the Ashram to live alone and meditate. At that time Madhava Swami was doing the job by himself.m. About ten days after my arrival I asked Bhagavan how I could attain Selfrealisation? He replied. Bhagavan surprised me by saying. As soon as I saw the photo I had the feeling that this was my Guru.you can attain Self-realisation.. It contained a photo of the Maharshi. thinking ‘all is one’. Don’t put your finger in the socket. the choosing and the discriminating will no longer be there." As a new comer I was too afraid to ask him how he knew. when I approached the hall. You need a body that is in good working order in order to realise the Self. It was like immersing myself in a cool pool after being in the hot sun. Having arrived at about 1 p.Electricity is a useful form of energy. Use it wisely. or how long he had been waiting. "Did you take twice as much as everyone else?" I was shocked because I was sure that no one had seen me do it. It is direct. It was always: "Do selfenquiry. ‘Poda’ [Go away!] and the leopard walked away. The problem was of funds. "Scientists have invented and produced the aircraft which can travel at great speeds in the sky. He just looked at the leopard and said. Bhagavan asked me to supervise construction work within the Ashram. While I was distributing the sweets outside the hall I went to a place where no one could see me and secretly helped myself to about double the quantity that I was serving to others. which came almost under miraculous circumstances. This incident made me realise that it was impossible to hide anything from Bhagavan. Why do you not give us a spiritual aircraft in which we can quickly and easily cross over the sea of samsara?'' Bhagavan replied. And within a few days my new identity got established. It is only because of your mind that it seems that there is no movement. brought a large plate of sweets. stop identifying with the body and try to be aware of the Self. When I went back to the hall and kept the empty plate under Bhagavan's sofa. he looked at me and said. who came for Bhagavan's darshan .A few days later I asked. After serving as an attendant for a month. who had been his attendant at the Skandasram. who was much impressed by Bhagavan. When I had been an attendant for about two weeks. Once when a leopard appeared he was not in the least afraid. published a long complimentary article about Bhagavan after he had his darshan . Soon after I came I was given a new name by Bhagavan. which I was to distribute to everyone in the Ashram. "The path of self-enquiry is the aircraft you need. Sometime later. One day Bhagavan mentioned that I reminded him of Annamalai Swami." In the years that followed. fast. They rarely came into the Ashram but at night they frequented the place where Bhagavan used to urinate. which is your real nature. He managed to track down the tiger but when he raised his rifle to shoot.and easy to use. This article came to the attention of a prince in North India. I had many spiritual talks with Bhagavan but his basic message never changed. Madras." When I first came to the Ashram there were still some leopards in the area.the Collector of Vellore. he felt paralysed . My big assignment was supervising the construction of the cowshed. You are already travelling very quickly towards realisation. The editor of The Sunday Times. My original name was Sellaperumal. the prince went for a tiger hunt. Bhagavan would frequently come out to see what we were doing. the postman appeared with Rs." The paralysis left him and he killed the tiger and saved his own life in the process. and told me what to do.by a wave of fear. .000. appear today on the top of the eastern wall of the dining hall. Maurice Frydman gave Rs. Bhagavan took a keen interest in the construction work. when I went to him with my daily report. But he would say. Our finances were always in a precarious position but we never experienced any real financial crisis. I just witness all that happens”. 1. "I am not connected with any of the activities here. Suddenly he remembered about Bhagavan and prayed saying. Bhagavan himself wrote in Tamil ‘Pakasalai’ in big letters on a piece of paper. He bombarded us with advice and instructions and would occasionally join in the work himself.000 to the sarvadhikari for buying fruits for Bhagavan. Knowing that Bhagavan would not eat fruits unless everyone else was given an equal share. Two days after all the quarrels about the size of the cowshed. Bhagavan never asked anyone for money and he forbade the sarvadhikari from asking for donations. He drew up the plans for Ashram buildings. he avoided use of the money for the purpose. guiding me at all stages of the work. but also donate the head and skin of the tiger. I will not only send you Rs. happily ignoring all predictions of imminent financial doom made by the sarvadhikari. When he gave me plans he would always say that it was only a suggestion. In the 1930s Bhagavan alone decided when and where the buildings should be built. Once when Bhagavan was very sick. For any difficult jobs he would even explain how to go about it. "If successful. as the tiger was within attacking distance. These along with the year ‘1938’ and ‘Sri Ramanasramam’ in devanagari script. Yet somehow enough donations came to complete every building. While the work was going on. In the evening. he would tell me the work to be done the following day. He never presumed to give me orders. 1. If instructions were complicated he would sometimes sketch a few lines on a piece of paper to clarify or illustrate what he was saying. on what scale and what material be used. We would start projects when no money was available to pay.1000. enough donations would come to cover all costs. Frydman complained to Bhagavan that his donation had not been properly spent. Some months later. maya follows. maya will not affect us anymore. he lived peacefully and silently in his little ashram. It also follows that if we cease to identify with the body. Once we identify ourselves with the body by thinking this thought.Bhagavan said rather angrily. He also provided spiritual guidance to seekers who wanted his help and guidance. "When you give something you should regard the matter as closed. Why use this gift to further your ego?" Annamalai Swami moved to Palakottu (a colony abutting the Ashram) in 1938. Till the end of his life in 1995. Annamalai Swami There are so many thoughts in the mind. But there is one thought that is continuous. . Thought after thought after thought. This is the string on which all other thoughts are threaded. though it is mostly sub-conscious: ‘I am the body’. I did not lose consciousness. at all. lies on a practical.1 by V Ganesan This posting is from a series of ‘sharings’ given by V Ganesan in the winter of 2008/2009 in Tiruvannamalai. What is the nature of this Ananda ? Is it the same Ananda the scriptures speak of ? Bhagavan replied: “Eating this Ganja is a very bad habit”. not to move out towards the southern side of his tenement. at the foot of the Hill. Who will guide us with a direct and simple. postulated throughout the past centuries seem to have helped us. He approved of his living alone outside the Ashram. After the first few seconds I completely lost all awareness of my body and the world. for ten years — from 1928 to 1938. Bhagavan Ramana . but this soon gave way to a state in which there were no feelings and no experiences. He did it with an exemplary zeal. years later. he came over to me. No theoretical methods. perhaps. Madhava Swami and I gave him the usual oil bath and massage. ==================================================================== How to give up the “me” ? Even to contemplate on its being given up. The only solution to this Herculean problem. Noticing the potentiality in him as a hard worker. He sought the guidance of the Master. yet natural experience-oriented practical solution to the dissolution of the “me” ? Most assuredly. Annamalai Swami came to Sri Bhagavan in 1928 and was made an attendant to the Master. Initially. he wanted to dedicate his whole time in meditation and contemplation. When the bath was over. poses us with an enormous hurdle. experiential approach to it. laughing loudly. he shared it with fellow-seekers. but should wander about only towards the north. and.— Annamalai Swami – Final Talks – p. hugged me and called out : Ananda ! Ananda ! This is how these Ganja-taking people behave ! It was not a brief hug. as well.** That totally changed him. he was entrusted with the supervision of all important construction projects of the then growing up ‘Sri Ramanasramam’ . Sri Bhagavan encouraged him to construct a dwelling at the adjacent ‘Palakottu’. I . even for a single day ! In Annamalai Swami’s own words : “I went to Bhagavan’s bathroom to help him with his morning bath. for instance. Annamalai Swami studiously put that instruction into daily practice to its very letter – he had not stepped into the road. Madhava Swami asked a question : ‘ Bhagavan ! The people who take Ganja Lehiyam [ an Ayurvedic medicine whose principal ingredient is cannabis ] experience some kind of Ananda [ bliss ] . he had a great spiritual awakening through an embrace of him by Sri Bhagavan. Then. helping him with practical advices during the construction. under the direct stewardship of Sri Bhagavan. there was a feeling of bliss and happiness. 14 “ ALL IS ONE ” – No. In 1938. Bhagavan gave a few personal advices. which lay on the southern side. Then on. Bhagavan Ramana has already solved the insoluble conundrum ! ANNAMALAI SWAMI had elicited it from the Great Guru. the rest of his life ! He had not also moved out of Arunachala. you go to the Source of this ‘little self’ . If you see the rope as a snake. ‘This little self is not really me ’ .just ceased to be aware of anything that was going on around me…. how to do this ? AS : The ‘little self’ is something which only appears to be real. The Master not only gave him an answer but also totally eradicated the ‘me’ in him. If you can convince yourself.” Sri Bhagavan told him to lead a quiet. long after the Master had dropped the body. AS : This ‘little self’ will give way to the real Self only when you meditate constantly. Understand that it has no real existence and it will stop troubling you. the snake is not there. leaving behind it the experience of the real and only Self. reclusive life and to meditate continuously on the Self. If you see only the rope. It is only when we identify ourselves with and limit ourselves to the body and the mind that this false self is born. If you understand that it has no real existence it will disappear. He used the term ‘the little self’ instead of the ‘me’ . If you can understand that this ‘little self’ never at any time had any existence outside your imagination. through enquiry. As soon as I regained normal consciousness I knew that my working life at the Ashram had come to an end.532 : . the real nature of the rope is hidden from you. I cannot break this habit merely by thinking ‘ I am not this little self ’ . Question : What is the easiest way to be free of ‘the little self ’ ? Annamalai Swami : Stop identifying with it. This is well brought out through a dialogue a Westerner had had with Annamalai Swami. Try to remember the analogy of the rope which looks like a snake in twilight. When you have that clear and correct perception that the snake never at any time existed. After many years of arduous and unremitting effort. I am very accustomed to feel ‘ I am this little self ’ . the question of how to kill the snake disappears. You cannot wish it away with a few stray thoughts. you will not be concerned about ways and means of getting rid of it. There is no limitation or ‘little self’ in it. Apply this analogy to the ‘little self’ that you are worrying about. Consciousness is universal. uninterruptedly and with effortless ease. Not only that. he was able to stabilize himself in SelfAwareness. it will just disappear. Q : But. you know that there never was a snake there. If.. Annamalai Swami pleaded with the Maharshi as how to give up the ‘me’ . Q : But.This experience completely changed my life. ******* Bhagavan Ramana clearly points out that there is only one way not to be affected by the miseries caused by the ‘me’ : Talks No. you find that it dissolves into nothingness. The good are always good.540 : Once Annamalai Swami asked : There is more pleasure in dhyana than in sensual enjoyments.Devotee : Is there no way of escape from the miseries of the world ? Maharshi : There is only one way and that consists in not losing sight of one’s Self. Even a moment’s dhyana to that effect is enough to destroy all the stored up age-old tendencies [ sanchita karma ] . Talks No. The experience of “I-am-the-Self” is the highest virtue. Yet. *************************** Talks No. ************************** Why has Sri Bhagavan been consistent in insisting on one experiencing the Self ? Talks No. Our essential nature is happiness. It is also perfect Bliss. ‘ Do not come near me ’ . The wicked say by their evil deeds.541 : A certain visitor asked Sri Bhagavan : There is so much misery in the world because wicked men abound in the world. What is to be done ? This vasana [tendencies] is very ancient and has continued for innumerable past births. It is that wrong identity that gives rise to misery. the mind runs after the latter and does not seek the former. happiness. To enquire “Who Am I ?” is the only remedy for all the ills of the world. How can one find happiness here ? M : All are gurus to us.536 : “The person soaked in the “I-am-the-body” idea is the greatest sinner and he is a suicide. **************************** . all persons are like gurus to us. Hence it has grown strong. can any sin. It works like the Sun before whom darkness is dispelled. asserts itself. Why is it so ? M : Pleasure or pain are aspects of the mind only. So then. survive his dhyana ? ” ************************************* Bhagavan Ramana not only explained why one should do dhyana but also insisted that one should constantly be in touch with one’s Self. under any circumstances. But we have forgotten the Self and imagine that the body or the mind is the Self. however heinous it be. viz. That must go before the essential nature. If one remains always in dhyana .. When one is active one should not care for the results and must not be swayed by the pain or pleasure met with occasionally. Is such a desire good or bad ? M : Such thoughts will bestow a janma (another birth) for their fulfillment. There is nothing external which is not also internal. A man’s true name is Mukti (Liberation) . On the other hand. knowledge and the object to be known. whereas this does not require any of them. If the mind is active. ****************************** Why did Sri Bhagavan repeatedly emphasize the efficacy of “Self-enquiry” ? Talks No.551 : A man asked Sri Bhagavan : “How is it that Atma Vidya is said to be the easiest ?” M : Any other vidya (learning) requires a knower. There is no use closing your eyes. What does it matter where and how you are placed ? The essential point is that the mind must always remain in its source. so that I may devote all my time to meditation only. one generally experiences that doing good to others one suffers. God who has sent us into the world has His own plan that will certainly work itself out. The world is not external to you. Close the mental eye and all will be right. Why so ? For. to all ! Talks No.546 : Annamalai Swami asked : A person does something good but he sometimes suffers pain even in his right activities. How is it ? This is a common doubt.542 : Annamalai Swami asked : I often desire to live in solitude where I can find all I want with ease.Should one not run away to solitude to obtain peace ? Talks No. The mind is all. One must try to hold on to the Self. “Who Am I ?”. The good persons will not care to make plans previous to their actions. He who is indifferent to pain or pleasure can alone be happy. Why should it be so ? Maharshi : Pain or pleasure is the result of past karma (past actions) and not of the present karma. It is the Self. even solitude becomes like a market place. ****************** In the day-to-day working. One must suffer or enjoy them patiently without being carried away by them. Pain and pleasure alternate with each other. one doing wicked deeds enjoys happy environments and success. Can anything be so obvious as that ? Hence it is the easiest. . All that you need do is to enquire. Another does something wicked but is also happy. ——————————————————————————————————————— . He told Annamalai Swami to read it “if he desired Moksha (Emancipation) ” . Sri Bhagavan himself had gone through it and given chapter headings for the benefit of seekers. In our next session.****************** The topic chosen for this session’s “Sharing” is entitled : “All Is One” . bringing out the worth and greatness of the work. at every level and of any faith. This tiny book incorporates ideas of immense use to spiritual aspirants. perhaps. we will further deal with it. What is the significance ? “All Is One” is an old Tamil publication commended by Sri Bhagavan.